


Remembrance

by sepia_cigarettes



Series: Harmonies [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M, band au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-17
Updated: 2014-04-17
Packaged: 2018-01-19 17:12:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 28,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1477549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sepia_cigarettes/pseuds/sepia_cigarettes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Where would you like to start?”</p><p>An innocent question. Still, it took Gaara a long time to stop staring at the brunet, taking in the pale eyes and paler skin, the clinging white pullover, the pianist fingers, the long, long locks that made him think of dark chocolate. It took even longer to say something other than, ‘you’.</p><p>Band AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	Remembrance

**Author's Note:**

> === FINAL UPDATE NOV 2017 ===
> 
> Hello friends, I finished my update, and managed to delete 5k of garbage in the process. I hope this version is a lot more comprehensive and succinct. If you're after the original version, send me a message. Next up: ToN sequel!
> 
> Much love.
> 
>  
> 
> === UPDATE NOV 2017 ===
> 
> I'm currently in the process of rewriting this; the plotline and many of the scenes will be relatively the same but after reading this for the first time in FOREVER and finding plot holes, inconsistencies, inaccuracies with Japanese culture, and quite frankly an appalling lack of research into the music industry, I've been overcome with the urge to fix it and bring it up to par with Tears of Namiko. I wrote Remembrance when I was a naive teenager and I was cringing a little as I read this, but if you'd like this version before it's deleted off the web and replaced, click the download button.
> 
> Once I've finished the re-write, I'll be working on the ToN sequel so hold onto your hats, folks!
> 
>  
> 
> === APR 2014 ===  
> HOlla holla. Yes, that is a deliberate typo. Apologies for any in the following work of…things. Send me a buzz if there're any in there (hoping there isn't).
> 
> This was actually meant to be short. I wanted it to be short. It didn't end up that way. Perhaps Gaara or Neji (and maybe Hinata) are a little OOC, but I figured that their development throughout the story would be this way, so they are as they are as a result.
> 
> Shitty title, but at least it isn't 'Shinobi Music', because that was the working title *cringes*
> 
> The music scene is basically metalcore-slash-metal-slash-rock-slash-punk.

**[Tuesday, 1 March: The Beginning]**

**_NEWS OF THE DAY: BLOODY SANDS ON INDEFINITE HIATUS_ **

_In latest_ Shinobi Music _news, metalcore band Bloody Sands have revealed that they are embarking on an indefinite hiatus. The announcement follows band member Sabaku no Temari's engagement to Nara Shikamaru of punk band Ino-Shika-Cho, sparking much debate on the possibility of Sabaku’s younger brother and Bloody Sands’ vocalist, Gaara, finally accepting best bro Uzumaki Naruto’s offer to collaborate on an album for fellow metalcore band, Seven Sins. The news also comes as a disappointment to Bloody Sands' fans, who had hoped for a promotional tour for their latest album,_ Self-centered _._

 

**[Saturday, 30 July: The Wedding]**

Gaara’s suit itched.

He tugged at the collar, wishing he could change back into normal clothes. Next to him, Kankurō rolled his shoulders, as if the suit would resize from the movement. Gaara looked at him and the brunet grunted, like he agreed with his brother’s unspoken sentence.

They were dressed in the uncomfortable suits thanks to Temari, the bride-to-be.

“Try to hurry, sister,” Kankurō droned, fingers playing on the rim of his glass of scotch. “A man can only wed once, and we’ll be here for another year at this rate.”

“Oh, shut up, Kankurō,” their sister’s voice came. “It’s a little difficult getting into a dress with this many layers, y'know.”

“Unbelievable,” the brunet snorted and he emptied his glass in one gulp. “Have a glass, Gaara. It’ll do you good getting some alcohol in you before the ceremony. You won’t be such a stick in the mud.”

“Knock it off,” Gaara said.

Whilst he agreed with Kankurō, he was not about to voice it. Instead he turned his head from side to side in an attempt to ease the snugness of his dress shirt. It was thirty-three minutes until the ceremony would begin, and being the dutiful brothers that they were, they were escorting their sister there.

There were five women fussing over Temari: Kyoko the dressmaker, Tayuya, Temari’s outspoken maid of honor, and the other three bridesmaids whose names Gaara didn’t remember.

Weddings, he decided, were far more stressful than they needed to be.

“One more loop!” Tayuya sighed loudly, and Gaara sniffed.

“Does that mean you’re half-way finished?” Kankurō drawled.

“Don’t be so morbid,” Tayuya stuck her head out from the partition. “It means she’s done. Come on, Temari. Show your brothers how beautiful you are.”

Temari stepped out. The first thing Gaara noticed was the expanse of white. White sleeves, white train, white shoes and white mini fan hair-clips. Then he saw his sister’s hair, nowhere near being tamed from its usual spiky self, bunched into two ponytails. Kankurō cleared his throat. Gaara managed a thin ghost of what was supposed to be a smile.

“You look lovely,” Kankurō spoke up, standing and wrapping his sister into a clumsy hug.

“You stink of alcohol,” Temari said in response.

“Ouch.”

The blonde grinned at him, before looking at Gaara. “Well? How do I look?”

Gaara raised a brow. To shrug would be rude, to smile would be false. And then there were words that needed to be spoken. They couldn’t be too blunt, otherwise his sister would be offended, but they couldn’t be too praising either because Gaara hated showing too much emotion.

“Like a cloud,” Gaara said truthfully.

Temari giggled all the same. She was probably too nervous about getting married to worry about Gaara’s lack of opinion. “Thanks.”

“Shall we get going?” Kankurō asked, already at the door.

“So impatient,” Tayuya chided, nudging Kankurō out the way and watching anxiously as Temari made her way out. “Watch the hem, Temari—and the train—Kami—Kankurō, you useless fool, hold her train—”

[#]

“Thank the gods,” Gaara muttered as he piled into the limousine with Kankurō and Temari.

Like himself, his older brother was already loosening his cuffs, having shrugged out of his jacket before they had even left the church after the family wedding photos. Tayuya was grinning like an idiot.

“They looked beautiful,” she said.

Gaara’s lip curled in distaste. The ceremony had been rather tedious. Nara had looked like he wanted to vomit the entire time, only changing his facial expression when he had kissed Temari.

The mob of photographers was following them down the lane, eager to get a glimpse of the bride’s brothers for the daily  _Shinobi Music_ news. It was a downside to being in a popular band, Gaara supposed. The newlyweds were having their couple photos taken, which would explain the abundance of attention on their vehicle instead.

“I’ve never seen a man so sober at his wedding,” Kankurō commented, ignorant of the flashes going off outside.

“That’s because unlike you,” Tayuya rolled her eyes as she stabbed a finger at his chest. “Shikamaru isn’t a drunkard.”

“You know I wasn’t talking about that sober.”

“You’re disgraceful.”

“Wrong, I’m a musician. Get your hands of me, would you?”

“I barely poked you."

“Would you two shut up?” Gaara scowled, and blessedly, they did.

It didn’t matter that they were five years older than him. When no arguments were forthcoming. Gaara inhaled deeply, resting back against his seat and closing his eyes.

A flash went off nearer his face, but he refused to dignify it with a glare. Let them take as many as they wanted. Bloody Sands’ hiatus meant more attention than before, and he was feeling spiteful. He hadn’t wanted to take a break. He had wanted to tour, but Temari had been adamant and Kankurō reluctant, enough to undermine Gaara’s wishes.

He fished out his phone, plugged in headphones and turned the volume up.

 

**[Tuesday, 9 February]**

**_UNDER THE SPOTLIGHT_ **

**_Shinobi Music’s Otaku Hiro talks with Gaara of Bloody Sands on music taste, crushes and rivalry._ **

**OH: Gaara, thanks for meeting with us today, and congratulations on your recent album. Your last two have had strong themes of violence and self-loathing, whereas this one seems to be leaning more towards a deeper, more emotional theme. What inspired this one?**

G: It’s self-explanatory.

**OH: Ah. Well, given the darker nature of this album, many believe you’ve changed your taste in music to something a little more heavy. So what type of music do you listen to? Do you listen to your own, or…?**

G: I don’t like to listen to my own music. I hear it too much. You write it, and record it, and then promote it, and then it plays over and over and over.

**OH: That makes sense, doesn’t it? Well who do you turn to then? Is it your best friend Uzumaki Naruto’s band, Seven Sins? Or are you more inclined to Akatsuki? I know their last few releases have been very fantastical and grungy; murderous, even.**

G: Hyūga Hinata.

**OH: The cellist?**

G: Her music is beautiful.

**OH: Am I sensing a secret crush here?**

G:  _Īe_. I just like her music.

**OH: I see! Moving on; there’s been a lot of discussion lately about a possible collaboration between you and Seven Sins. Is this the case?**

G: _Īe_.

**OH: That will disappoint many fans, I’m sure. Will there be a tour for your latest album then?**

G:  _Īe_.

**OH: Another blow to the fans. You sure know how to disappoint, Sabaku no Gaara. Well then, if not a tour, then tell us a little more about _Self-centered._ You said it was self-explanatory, and many believe it may be based on your own personal experiences.**

G: Perhaps.

**OM: Ever the elusive answerer, Gaara. By the way, congratulations on your older sister’s recent engagement. I bet you listen to a lot of Ino-Shika-Cho now.**

G: I don’t.

**OH: Even if their guitarist is to marry your sister? I sense a rivalry here.**

G: I prefer classical music.

**OH: A metalcore artist like you who screams their lungs out in every song and you prefer classical music. What a legend. Well, that’s all the time we have today. Thanks for dropping by, Gaara!**

**_Bloody Sands’ album,_ ** **Self-centered** **_will be yours to own in less than a week! See volume for details._ **

 

**[Saturday, 30 July: The Reception]**

The lights were hurting Gaara’s eyes. Music vibrated through every surface, making him feel both sick and alive. He should have been used to this, he was a singer, for Kami’s sake, but the steady pounding tempo and the synthesizer were doing his head in at the moment.

 _Seven Sins did an electronicore album,_  Gaara reminded himself.  _And you liked it. This isn’t much different. Just more repetitive with softer lyrics._

It didn’t change his opinion. The tempo picked up even more and he winced. He shouldn’t have let Naruto give him so much alcohol; he was finding it difficult to stand. Nearby, someone activated a smoke machine, and Gaara’s eyes watered at the stench of sweat and alcohol. He needed a cigarette.

Strange place for a wedding reception, but there were more unusual places to be, Gaara decided. They were situated at a promenade, a rolling expanse of land on which to celebrate, and a gaping ocean out the front.

The newlyweds had left a little while ago, leaving the rest of the crowd to party until they either a) dropped dead from all the alcohol, or b) got bored and went home. Gaara was vying for the latter option, but Kankurō had stopped him from leaving immediately after Temari. It was rude, he had explained. Gaara had glared at his brother and snatched his glass away for himself.

So perhaps it wasn’t just Naruto’s fault that he was slightly intoxicated.

“Gaara! Come on! I want you to meet someone!”

It was Naruto. The blond was all damp, like a Labrador, and he seized Gaara’s hand, ignoring his protests and dragging him onto the dance floor. Gaara’s only thought was that the dance floor was not the best place to use as a thoroughfare. The crowd was a mess of stuffy gyrating bodies, trying to pull him every which way.  He had to pry off a couple of exploring hands. Naruto kept leading, oblivious. Stupid Naruto. He let himself be led.

They finally eased out of the crowd, Naruto taking him away from the glaring lights and onto the beach. It was much cooler here, and Gaara kicked off his shoes when the blond directed him to do so, leaving them on the grass.

The sand whispered between his toes. He wondered if Naruto would make sandcastles with him.

He tugged on Naruto’s collar, pointing at the ground, “Come make a sandcastle.”

“Maybe later,” Naruto grinned. He jerked a thumb at four figures in the near distance. “I just want you to meet someone first, yeah?”

“Later then,” Gaara made sure the blond understood his intentions, before following.

The quartet turned to welcome them when they walked over, Gaara instantly recognizing two of Naruto’s band mates. He had not seen them all day, having been confined to his sister’s side.

“Gaara,” Sakura, Seven Sins’ vocalist with the outrageous pink hair, greeted, giving him a hug.

She had never gotten the meaning of Gaara’s warning glares. He was too drunk to protest, anyway.

The next to speak was Yamanaka Ino, Shikamaru’s band mate and Ino-Shika-Cho’s vocalist. She had looped her arm through Sakura’s. “Congrats about your sister. She looked beautiful.”

“ _Hai_ ,” he said as a thanks.

“Yes, congratulations are in order.”

Gaara had never understood Sai, Seven Sins’ keyboardist. He reminded Gaara of a robot, with his preplanned sentences and awkward smiles.

“Yeah, yeah,” Naruto interrupted them, waving his hands around. “That’s unimportant at the moment. Gaara, I want you to meet a friend of mine.”

He ushered the fourth person forward.

“Hyūga Hinata,” Gaara blinked.

“Hello,” Hinata said.

Her hair was just as blue and just as long as it was in the magazine covers and posters she had graced.

“I listen to you,” Gaara said stupidly.

Of all the times to meet his favorite artist and it had to be now, at his sister’s wedding reception when he was intoxicated. Good job, Gaara, great one.

“Oh.” Hinata’s cheeks had gone pink.

“I think your music is beautiful,” Gaara continued, feeling like he had reached the level of speaking that people called ‘rambling’; a new development, given his tendency to answer in monosyllabic form.

He hoped she didn’t think him a fool.

The cellist went pinker, stuttering, “T-thank you."

“Stop scaring the poor girl,” a familiar drawl came.

It was attached to Uchiha Sasuke, Seven Sins’ guitarist and Naruto’s love interest (but that was another story altogether). Uchiha Sasuke was negative and self-centered enough to give Gaara a run for his money, but the raven always justified himself by putting it down to his bloodline. Gaara still had no idea what Naruto saw in him.

“Uchiha,” Gaara said, hoping his voice came out as venomous.

He was fairly sure it sounded childish instead. Sasuke’s smug smirk was indicative of that. Damn the alcohol. Gaara was never drinking again.

“Sabaku,” Sasuke nodded.

Naruto turned to scold the raven, “Took your time.”

“We got distracted,” Sasuke offered, looking to his left, and Gaara noticed his companion for the first time. “Didn’t we, Neji?”

“Yes, I’ve always found so much enjoyment in studying the patterns of tablecloths,” the brunet said.

“Well that sounds like a whole lot of fun,” Ino chirped.

Gaara couldn’t stop watching. Siblings? Unlikely, because from what Gaara had read online, Hinata only had a younger sister who was a budding violinist. And yet, the brunet was definitely related; they shared the same pale skin and violet eyes. What interested him was the difference in hair color: a chocolate brown in comparison to Hinata’s midnight blue locks. He wondered if this person was musical.

“Put the man out of his misery,” Sasuke said. “He’ll burn a hole into Hinata’s head at this rate.”

Gaara hadn’t realized he had been staring so openly. He was losing his inhibitions. He scrambled for them, piling them up in his hands and holding them close so they couldn’t escape.

“Gaara.” It was Ino. “Do you want to let go of my hair now?”

“ _Gomen_.” Gaara apologized, folding his arms so he couldn’t embarrass himself any further.

“This is Hyūga Neji,” Naruto supplied in response to the question asked long before, gesturing towards the brunet. “Hinata’s cousin.”

Gaara nodded in semi-understanding, the pieces finally clicking into place, albeit a little haphazardly. He frowned as his vision blurred for a moment, then stumbled when his bearings left him. He felt dizzy all of a sudden.

“ _Great_. Who got him drunk?” Sasuke’s voice sounded muffled, as if Gaara was underwater.

“Kankurō, I’ll bet,” Sakura’s voice too, was distant. “Gaara, honey, I think you need to sit down. Can you do that?”

“I can do anything. I don’t need to sit.” Gaara mumbled, shaking his head to get rid of the dizziness.

It didn’t help.

Naruto was there next, “Gaara, you should sit down, buddy. You’ll fall over otherwise.”

“And then can we make sandcastles?”

“Sure,” Naruto chuckled. “Any time.”

Hyūga Neji, the brunet cousin of Gaara’s favorite artist, knelt down to his level. His pale eyes skimmed over Gaara’s form. Gaara wondered if it was in concern or in amusement. He couldn’t tell.

“ _Daijōbu_?” the brunet said quietly.

“I’m fantastic,” Gaara replied, even as a wave of nausea hit him.

He threw up. Then he blacked out.

**[Sunday, 31 July: The Hangover]**

**_NEWS OF THE DAY: NEW GENERATION OF HYŪGA HARMONY?_ **

_Hyūga Entertainment Label—famous for their stout allegiance to classical music—have announced that two of their upcoming members, cousins Hinata and Neji are collaborating with Seven Sins on their next album._

_Surprising news, considering the metalcore nature of Seven Sins. Hyūga Entertainment revealed the motivation behind the move is to branch out into other genres to secure their future in the musical world, and the odds are in their favor._

_Hyūga Hinata has already begun to make a path in the classical community with her skills as principle cellist in the Konoha Philharmonic Orchestra, and her debut solo album released last year that went Platinum twice. Meanwhile, her cousin Hyūga Neji is a songwriter and pianist who has worked on several of his label-mates’ albums._

_Seven Sins’ decision to include the two has sparked rumors about a possible revival of the dark ambient duo, ‘Hyūga Harmony’, a project of their fathers that was disbanded in the early 90s._

_The news serves as a potential enticement for fellow metalcore band Bloody Sands’ vocalist, Sabaku no Gaara, to join the project. Previously, Gaara has refused to collaborate, with many speculating his sister Temari’s impending nuptials to Ino-Shika-Cho guitarist Nara Shikamaru._

_Given the wedding took place yesterday morning in Konohagakure, and Gaara’s recent confession as a lover of Hinata’s music, it seems there are few excuses to be made. Perhaps we might see the vocalist on the album after all._

[#]

Gaara stared at the latest issue of  _Shinobi Music_. The words were swimming together. His head hurt. The orange juice tasted like something had pissed in it.

“Do you see?” Naruto had said when he had shoved the issue in Gaara’s face earlier. “Hyūga Hinata is on our album.  _Hyūga Hinata_.”

“I know.” Gaara had replied, a little bitter at the fact that his best friend was doing an album with his favorite musician. “Stop rubbing it in my face already.”

The blond had disappeared suddenly, telling Gaara he would be back in a moment. It had given him enough time to register that Naruto had left a bottle of painkillers and a glass of OJ with him. The pills had stuck in his throat. He had already given his opinion on the juice.

The news soured him more than his blistering hangover though. Naruto not only had his favorite musician; he also had her super-attractive cousin on the team as well. And all the while, Bloody Sands weren’t going anywhere thanks to his stupid sister deciding to get hitched and his even more stupid brother resolving to chase his ridiculous hobby of puppetry.

As if the face paint wasn’t bad enough.

Naruto reentered the lounge. He sat down on the opposing couch and folded his legs underneath him like a pretzel. He was holding one of those instant ramen cups, the ones with the pre-cooked vegetables and little sauce sachets. Gaara studied it, trying to get his painful head under control. He had never liked packet ramen. The waxy smell was off-putting. It was one of the few things he agreed with Sasuke on.

“How the hell did you manage to sway Hyūga Entertainment?” Gaara spoke, voice scratchier than normal.

“I have ties with them,” the blond was evasive. “ _Plus_ Neji likes me.”

“Oh?” Gaara was unhappy. “And what does Sasuke think of that?”

It wasn’t surprising to Naruto’s tanned face flush red. He knew the two had a history—‘a story’, as Naruto liked to call it—and that something had happened at the end of last year that made Sasuke return to the band after two years gallivanting between Sound Music bands, but the blond had been unusually silent, and Gaara didn’t want to pry. He understood the desire for space. Not many people did.

Naruto slurped at his ramen, stalling as always. “It’s not like that.”

“I see.”

Gaara picked up the magazine again, grimacing at the title. Then he read on, scoffing at the article’s choice of words. He hadn’t ‘refused’ to collaborate; he had politely declined.

“Do an album with me, Gaara, would you?” Naruto said in a beseeching tone.

Gaara pinched his forehead. “Why do you want me so much?”

“Because you’re one of my closest friends.” Naruto caught the disbelieving look that Gaara sent him and added quickly, “And, Sakura wants a male vocalist that won’t just be backup.”

“Adding a masculine touch?”

“Just deeper,” Naruto rubbed the back of his neck. “Kiba is too busy with uni to do more than one song, and Tayuya wasn’t that keen on giving me Kimimaro.”

“I can’t believe he came back to music.”

Naruto shrugged. “His decision.”

“Is it really that important that I join you?”

“Is that a yes?”

“No. I have…plans.”

Naruto pointed an accusatory finger at him, “Bullshit! Your band is on hiatus.”

“I am aware.” Gaara blinked, rubbed his nose on the cuff of his sleeve and stared resolutely at the carpet. “I don’t even know if I want to.”

“But Hinata…” Naruto taunted. “Come on, man! Don’t be such a stick in the mud. Look, you know what? You don’t even have to sing on every song. You can just help with the songwriting and recording if you want.”

“Doesn’t that defeat the entire purpose?”

Naruto waved his hands dramatically, “Well it’s not as if you’re about to help anyway!”

Gaara held up a hand to silence him, his head pounding, “Naruto.”

“Do it, Gaara,” Naruto begged. “Sasuke can sing, but he refuses to let anyone hear him, and the only reason I know that is because I overheard him when he thought the apartment was empty.”

“Isn’t that sweet?” Gaara’s tone was mocking. “Where is your boyfriend, by the way?”

“Out,” Naruto didn’t even bother correcting him; he had grown used to Gaara’s jibes. “But he’s refusing to sing, and you’re one of my best friends.”

“Naruto—”

“You scream really well. It’ll be perfect with Sakura.”

“I don’t—”

“Please? I didn’t just get Hinata because I felt like it.”

Gaara’s brow raised at the consideration Naruto had given him. He mulled over the decision. The blond was offering him a chance to get back into the music industry, as well as a collaboration with Hyūga Hinata.

He’d be another stupid Sabaku sibling if he didn’t accept. “An album, huh? Not just a featured song…thing.”

“ _Yes,_ and it’ll be great because you write well and Sasuke and Sai are _mint_ when it comes to pairing lyrics with music.”

Gaara made a face, “I’m joining your band, aren’t I?”

Naruto’s ridiculously blue eyes gazed imploringly at him, “You mean you’ll do it? You’ll do the album?”

He uttered a long-suffering sigh. “I’ll talk to my lawyer.”

“Legend!”

The tackle hug Naruto gave him was…not worth it.

 

**[Monday, 1 August: The Meeting]**

**_NEWS OF THE DAY: GAARA JOINING AS NEW BAND MEMBER OF SEVEN SINS_ **

_It has been less than a month since Bloody Sands announced their hiatus, but vocalist Gaara has risen above that fact by finally acquiescing and jumping in on Seven Sins’ upcoming album as an official part of the band._

_“We’re all pretty excited to see what the next year brings us,” Haruno Sakura, frontwoman of Seven Sins said when questioned. “Gaara is a wonderful singer and I’m really keen to see where this goes.”_

_Gaara’s constant refusal to collaborate has been the source of much debate, and though many prepositions were made, none stood out more than Seven Sins’ guitarist Uchiha Sasuke blaming the moody redhead’s ego._

_Fueling the possibility of potential tension within the band are some critics who are concerned over Gaara’s residual mental health problems, despite being two years since Gaara’s very public breakdown and subsequent admission to a rehabilitation center._

_So what will the new album bring? It is an unorthodox marriage, mixing classical music with metalcore. What can fans expect? It seems only time will tell._

[#]

Gaara hated the media. He hated  _Shinobi Music_  as well. He couldn’t understand why Naruto always read it. It always exaggerated things. He closed his laptop and placed it on the table, scrolling through his music on his phone. His mental health was still a work in progress, but to see it used against him repeatedly was draining.

He had been in a bad place when he was nineteen. It had been a dangerous cocktail of insomnia, unresolved anger issues and chronic stress, and he had a major breakdown whilst performing a Bloody Sands concert. It was not a good memory.

He had wanted to die. He almost did, had Naruto not dragged him out of the shower two weeks later and called an ambulance.

Rehab had been a lot harder than he thought it would be, but he learned how to be more patient, and he was beginning to understand the importance of self-care, so it had not been time wasted.

The one thing he needed to remind himself was that it was all a work in progress.

Resolving to forget the incident, Gaara turned to his coffee instead. He was meeting with the Hyūga duo and the members of Seven Sins at nine to brainstorm, but he was early, as usual. Seven Sin’s band manager, Hatake Kakashi, was renowned for being tardy, and Gaara did not expect him to show, despite Naruto’s assurances that he would.

He needed a smoke. He hadn’t had one since yesterday, and his nerves were getting all fidgety. Naruto had given him a pack a week ago, and he’d finished it yesterday. He wasn’t addicted, per se, but he wasn’t a social smoker either.

Work in progress, he reminded himself.

A person sat down in the chair opposite his. Hyūga Hinata. She was wearing a dress today, a lilac one that came to her knees. He remembered the trench coat she wore over the top from the wedding reception. She looked incredibly pretty.

“Hello,” she squeaked.

“Hi,” Gaara said back.

Another person sat down next to him. Hyūga Neji.

Whilst Hinata was pretty and cute, her cousin was beautiful. He had a white pullover on. It suited him well, Gaara thought. He nodded a greeting at Gaara.

“Damn. I thought I was early.” It was Sakura.

She sat on the other side of Gaara. She still didn’t care that Gaara had little patience for anyone. The pink-haired vocalist ordered herself a coffee, offering the rest of them. Gaara declined. Hinata ordered green tea and Neji got a hot chocolate.

Sun rays beamed down, catching the back of Gaara’s neck. He rubbed it self-consciously, hoping he wouldn’t get burnt. There were downsides to being paler than most. As least it wasn’t as bad as the Hyūgas. Both had milky-white skin, unblemished.

Naruto and Sasuke finally arrived with Sai, the former two looking very annoyed. Sai had his usual fake smile.

“Took your time,” Gaara echoed from the night of Temari’s wedding reception.

“My apologies,” Sasuke said sarcastically, pulling up a chair next to Neji as Naruto sat next to Hinata.

The waitress came and set down their orders, and there seemed to be an unspoken agreement to stay quiet, as if she was out to gain information on the album planning. Gaara folded his arms habitually. As soon as she was gone, Naruto cleared his throat.

“Alright,” the blond started. “I’ll start by thanking Neji and Hinata for joining us on this album.”

“No problem,” Neji answered.

Gaara didn’t turn to admire him. Both of them were so attractive. He wondered how long he would get to spend with the two of them, working on the project.

Naruto was still talking. He redirected his attentions.

“…and also Gaara, who’s our new temporary band member until Bloody Sands reunites.”

Sakura clapped happily with Sai and Naruto gave him a grin. Gaara nodded once, uncomfortable.

“Cool,” the blond rubbed his hands together. “Time for business. We’re known for our metalcore, so I was thinking of blending it with some dark ambient, neo classical stuff.”

“Which is where you two,” Sasuke gestured towards Neji and Hinata, “come in.”

“We’re not sure about timeframe, but it would be great if we got to preproduction ASAP, say, three months?”

“At least,” Neji countered.

“But Gaara’s band might be back,” Sakura said. “I talked to Temari, and she seemed keen to get back into it after a couple of months of married life.”

Gaara tilted his head. He hadn’t heard anything of the sort from his sister, but then again, he wasn’t the closest to his siblings. The only reason they were in a band in the first place was because of their father’s pressure and their uncle Yashamaru’s encouragement.

“Gaara?” Naruto was looking at him.

“ _Tabun_ ,” he shrugged. “Neither were very enthusiastic when we last spoke about it.”

“We’ll keep that in mind then,” the blond decided. “So, full-length. Let’s figure out some themes to start with.” The blond pulled out notepads and pens from his bag, distributing them, “We’ll split up. Two pairs and one trio—that’ll be you, my three band mates—don’t look at me like that. I love you. Gaara, you alright working with Neji?”

Gaara sat up. “Sure?”

“Looks like the fun is beginning,” Sasuke said, glaring at the blond.

Naruto didn’t notice; he had already moved to sit with Hinata. Sasuke looked terribly jealous. Naruto laughed at something Hinata said and the black look that stole over Sasuke’s face was priceless. They were both idiots. Gaara hid a smirk as Sasuke turned to Sakura and Sai with thinly-veiled annoyance and grabbed a pen to draw arrows between the points they had made in his absence.

“Well then. Should we begin?” Neji’s voice was soft when it spoke, but it commanded an audience. It was a lot like Gaara’s, actually.

“Yeah,” he responded, taking up his allocated pen and hovering over the paper.

“Where would you like to start?”

An innocent question. Still, it took Gaara a long time to stop staring at the brunet, taking in the pale eyes and paler skin, the clinging white pullover, the pianist fingers, the long, long locks of hair.

He didn’t say, ‘ _you_ ’.

He said the first word that he could think of instead.

“Storms?”

[#]

Temari rang him that night, telling him about her discovery of him joining Seven Sins and asking him why he didn’t tell his older siblings.

“I did not think you needed to know,” Gaara replied.

He had another headache. The day had been full of ideas and mind maps and creative processes, and it was going to take some getting used to. Gaara usually wrote all his lyrics in his head before transferring them onto paper to give to his siblings to pair them with music, and he found Seven Sins’ technique somewhat hindering.

Patience. Work in progress. He just needed to remember that.

“ _Of course we need to know,_ ” Temari’s voice was persuasive. “ _We’re your family. It would have been nice to know so we could give you our support._ ”

Gaara shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. His throat was hurting more than usual from having to talk so much during the day and his sister had always been irritating.

_Patience._

“ _Look, I know you’ve been upset with us going on hiatus_ ,” Temari continued. “ _Seven Sins looks like a nice medium before we come back._ ”

Gaara chewed the inside of his cheek, grimaced, then answered, “Thank you, Temari.” He paused, unsure, then decided to go for it anyway, “Why are you ringing on your honeymoon?”

There was a long silence on the other end of the line, so long that Gaara almost asked if she was still there. He glanced at the fridge when it began to beep at him. He had forgotten he was standing in front of it.

“ _About that. Shikamaru and I…we’ve decided to stay here for a little while longer._ ”

He was over people, he really was. Naruto was running low on milk.

“Define ‘a little while’.”

“ _We’re not too sure._ ”

He sighed. “I see.”

That extended their trip around the work to three months. Chances of Bloody Sands every reuniting were slowly dwindling. Hell, the newlyweds were probably already thinking of children. Gods.

“Is that it, or?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Temari said slowly.

“Okay.”

He mulled over the option of giving her some well wishes. Then he thought better of it and hung up.

 

**[Thursday, 11 August: Close Quarters]**

**_NEWS OF THE DAY: SABAKU FAMILY BUSY AS EVER AS STARVING MARIONETTES ANNOUNCE INTENTIONS TO TOUR_ **

_The long-awaited tour of melodic metalcore duo Starving Marionettes is finally here, folks! And despite Bloody Sands’ hiatus, the two Sabaku brothers are still very much present in the music industry._

_Already metalcore band Seven Sins’ next album has been the subject of much discussion thanks to Gaara’s role as the newest band member, but now the eldest male of Bloody Sands has made a comeback to the music industry, with Starving Marionettes announcing Kankurō as their supporting act._

_A side-project comprised of heavy metal band Akatsuki members Deidara and Sasori, Starving Marionettes produced three successful EPS over two years and left their fans riding on a possible tour without delivering. They cited personal reasons for their reluctance, but yesterday the two confirmed their intentions, delivering a double whammy by announcing Sabaku’s support for all dates._

_‘We were just so overwhelmed with the feedback we were getting when we started,’ Sasori told_ SM. _‘We threw ourselves into making music to keep it that way. It seemed about time to give the fans what they really wanted, especially since we’ve had so much support from them.’_

_They described their choice of Sabaku as a ‘joint decision’, Deidara stating, ‘it wasn’t really a question…we both love Bloody Sands, and to have at least one member on our tour is great.’_

_Sabaku himself voiced his thoughts on the announcement, calling it ‘a great opportunity,’ and that he saw the impending tour as a way to promote Starving Marionettes to success. Starving Marionettes will commence their tour in January. Tickets will be yours to purchase on 20 August!_

[#]

Gaara scowled at the news and almost called his brother to abuse him. Almost. In the end the only thing that stopped him was him passing by the refrigerator and remembering he had water ices in there. His throat won out.

Patience, he thought grimly. Work in progress.

Besides, he wasn’t keen on hurling insults at Kankurō when Hinata was sitting in the lounge, legs folded in neatly and cello resting at her side in its case. He had not been granted the privilege of hearing her play yet, but no matter. The point was that she was there in the H&YM band lounge, and they were going to be together working on an album, _and_ they now lived together.

The Hyūga lived on the other side of Konoha, a whole hour’s drive away from the others who lived near H&YM, and Gaara was from Suna. He could only borrow Naruto and Sasuke’s couch for so long, and Neji and Hinata weren’t keen on the daily commute, so the three of them leased an apartment together a block away from the others.

Sitting next to Hinata was Naruto, and beside him was Sasuke, who had somehow managed to move away from Sakura and Sai on the opposing couch in the short space of time that Gaara had been in the kitchen.

Pathetic.

Gaara ran his eyes over the news story again and a flare of irritation sparked within him. Kankurō’s participation in Starving Marionettes’ tour meant a more than a year-long hiatus for Bloody Sands. He wasn’t sure who he wanted to murder first: his love-struck sister or his retarded brother.

“Gaara?”

He started, looking at the source of the question. It was Hinata.

“Yes?”

“Naruto…” she began, before breaking off. “He would like to know if you want to join us again in the lounge.”

“What for?”

“He just had a new idea about a guitar riff.”

Gaara glanced towards the others. Naruto was grinning encouragingly at him. Gaara couldn’t understand why the blond felt the need to get Hinata to ask when he could have just called out.

“Sure.”

Hinata dipped her head, then smiled, and damn, that made Gaara pause for a bit. Then he realized she wanted him to accompany her back. He didn’t think he had ever moved quicker.

Sasuke was smirking at him when Gaara sat down next to Sakura and Sai, but Gaara couldn’t care less. His previous inner monologue about the raven’s hopeless devotion to Naruto had soothed his hatred a little.

 

**[Monday, 5 September: Needing Direction]**

Hatake Kakashi may be renowned for his tardiness, but he was a music producer through and through, and their latest meeting with him was to solidify that fact. It didn’t matter that they had been adrift with no direction for five weeks, because he was here to point them the right way.

“It’s good,” he said, hands clasped before him. “It’s a start, obviously, but it’s good.”

And that was it.

Gaara was fuming when they returned to the band lounge.

Naruto rolled his eyes, waved a hand in the air, and said, “Well hey, at least he liked it?”

“Liked what, exactly?” Sasuke snapped. “Our half-baked idea of dark ambient metalcore and a theme of nostalgia?”

“He’s got a boyfriend,” Sakura offered. “He could be worse.”

Gaara didn’t see that as a valid excuse, and Sakura and Kakashi’s poorly hidden attraction for one another was a different story altogether.

“Right,” Sasuke said, tone still bored and monotonous. “Come on. There’s no point in moping about it. The album isn’t going to write itself.”

Gaara stepped over and located his notebook, taking it up and resuming his spot next to the window.

He had not worked with Neji again since the café, but the brunet had moved to helping Hinata iron out a cello sample, so Gaara had been left with the beginnings of a song on storms and not much else. The brunet had stretched himself out on the floor near Gaara, chocolate hair pooling around him in strands and a pencil clutched between his teeth. He was still beautiful, but Gaara didn’t let himself stare; he returned to thinking about lyrics.

“Gaara, what do you think about this one?” Sakura said as she sat next to him.

Then she hummed a bit, before singing as she read her notebook. He glanced at the page it was open at. Sakura wrote like a schoolteacher, with precise curves and religiously dotted ‘i’s and crossed ’t’s. She’d be a fearsome teacher, he decided, if she ever wanted to choose a different career path.

“Do you like it?” he asked.

“You’re supposed to be answering that question.”

Gaara scanned it again, taking in the content. It screamed of Sakura’s input. He wrinkled his nose.

“Am I on it?”

“ _Tabun_.”

Which really meant  _yes,_ but Sakura probably thought she was being nice by letting Gaara say no (which would most likely result in him getting bullied into doing it anyway).

“Alright. It’s missing something though.”

“Yeah, see that’s the problem. I have the intro down pat I think, but I can’t figure out a good bridge. The beat goes like this, right?” And she tapped it out. “And then I want the chorus to look like this—” She circled the lyrics in red, “—but I can’t link them.”

“Well.” Gaara looked at his notepad, then hers. They really went about writing songs much differently. “I could do the bridge. I’ll see what I come up with.”

“Ah! Bless you.” The pink-haired vocalist gave him a grateful smile and sat next to Sai again, batting at his pen until he paid attention. Gaara coughed. He wanted a cigarette. He said as much to Naruto, before exiting onto the balcony.

Gaara’s fingers fumbled with the lighter a couple of times before he got it. The first drag always hurt, even whilst feeling good.

The door opened and shut behind him. It was Neji. Gaara appraised him, then held up his packet. The brunet made a face and shook his head.

“Disgusting habit,” he commented.

Gaara had to agree with that.

“You don’t talk much, do you?” the brunet said, voice still containing its hard edge.

Gaara had thought that fact was well established considering their group work the other day. Perhaps not.

“Sometimes it hurts a bit,” Gaara said by way of explanation.

“Ah. All the screaming, is it?” At Gaara’s nod, the brunet continued, “Smoking probably doesn’t help.”

 _Neither does sleep deprivation,_ Gaara thought, but he didn’t voice it, turning to his cigarette instead. At least he wasn’t completely addicted.

Neji watched him, then directed his attentions to the city below them. Gaara had no idea why the brunet had joined him outside; possibly to get some fresh air, but then the objective was slightly void, given that Gaara was polluting the general vicinity with his smoke.

He took another drag, asking, “What are you doing here?”

Neji’s smile was wry. “What are  _you_  doing here?”

Gaara blinked, then held up his cigarette.

The brunet snorted, “Obviously. You misunderstood. What are you doing with Seven Sins?”

Ah. Gaara cleared his throat gingerly. Smoked a little more to stall. It wouldn’t do to tell the brunet that Hinata’s involvement on the album was the main reason he was here. He seemed protective of her.

“Naruto,” he settled on. “He’s been asking. For a while.”

“Finally got too much?”

“I wanted to work on my patience,” he said, wondering why he had even divulged that much. “You?”

The brunet understood. “Babysitting, kind of.”

Gaara nodded and continued to smoke. They stayed in silence whilst he did, and Gaara spent his time stealing surreptitious looks at the brunet. He needed to stock up on some new adjectives. ‘Beautiful’ was becoming inadequate.

Neji glanced over at him after some minutes had passed. “You’re very quiet for a singer. Usually they’re full of themselves and you can’t shut them up.”

Gaara’s lips curled up a little. “Do they?”

“Don’t they?”

Gaara studied his diminishing cigarette and tapped the ash over the side, pondering if he should divulge the brunet in on his personal life or not. He decided he should, given the fact that he kept ogling him in his spare time.

“My father…” he started, trailing off. “He always wanted Bloody Sands. I didn’t.”

Neji tilted his head slightly, and even that movement was flawless. Gaara pushed on.

“It wasn’t until my uncle encouraged me. Otherwise…”

He didn’t finish, but Neji nodded nonetheless, piecing it all together. Gaara liked him immensely for it. He wanted to ask the brunet why he chose piano, because he already knew the brunet’s family was the reason he was in music.

Neji shifted though, glancing over his shoulder behind him, and when Gaara looked that way he saw Naruto puttering around the kitchen. The blond saw the two of them outside and waved, before setting down the bowl in his hands (instant ramen; of course) and joining them.

“ _Kami_ , it’s  _freezing_.” Naruto said, hugging his arms to his chest. “How are you two out here?”

Gaara held up his cigarette, despite it being little more than the filter. He waited for the blond to acknowledge it, then chucked it over the side.

“We were complaining,” Neji said smoothly, pale eyes meeting Gaara for affirmation.

He wordlessly agreed without hesitation.

“‘Bout what?” Naruto asked, sniffing in the cold.

“Your useless band manager.”

Gaara could agree with that. Naruto had the decency to look abashed, and he scratched his head.

“Yeah, well. That’s Kakashi for you.”

“What have you lured us into, Naruto?” Neji said, voice light.

Naruto grinned, all teeth. “An album that’s going to shake the world. Now get your asses inside. Sakura wants to go over lyrics with you, Gaara.”

“I already did.”

Neji spared him a knowing look. “No rest for the wicked.”

It was very hard not to smile.

 

**[Friday, 30 September: Cabin Fever]**

Two months down, and Gaara was ready to call it quits. One could only take so much of essentially living in other peoples’ pockets, and Gaara was antisocial in general, so being around Seven Sins every day was starting to make him irritable and snappish. It didn’t help that Sasuke was choosing to sulk as well, so the two of them had everyone else walking around them on tiptoes.

Work in fucking progress.

On the plus side, Gaara had finished the demos for two songs with Sakura and forwarded them to Kakashi for him to critique. He wasn’t anticipating a hasty reply.

Their remaining demo song count was now eight, but no one had reached an agreement on any of them, so they were languishing in a pile termed ‘maybe’ whilst they all tried to come up with something else. It was frustrating.

What was also frustrating was that Temari hadn’t sent word that she was coming back any time soon. Gaara supposed that she and Shikamaru planned to have a six-month-honeymoon travelling through Europe. Kankurō was busy planning for his upcoming tour with Starving Marionettes, so Gaara hadn’t heard much from him either.

Gaara sighed, contemplated his glass of orange juice (much better than the previous one he had at Naruto’s following his sister’s wedding) and glared at the piece of paper lying next to it. His brain wasn’t working. It was still that stupid storm song glaring up at him.

Naruto was sitting on the couch, headphones on and blond head bobbing to whatever beat was playing. Naruto was a sucker for Akatsuki, the band that Sasuke’s older brother was in, and Gaara could hear the familiar tune. Naruto needed to turn his volume down. That, or get a hearing check-up.

At least the rest of the band lounge was quiet.

Hinata had a performance the next week that she was busy rehearsing for; Sakura had taken the day off to ‘focus on her relationship with Ino’, and Sasuke was at the arcade with his former band members of Taka. Gaara didn’t know where Sai was.

“What’s up?”

Gaara looked up, meeting Neji’s gaze.

“You look like you’re thinking up how best to murder a school assembly or something.”

Gaara tried for a smile, because it was most obviously a joke, but he wasn’t quite sure that he got it. Neji ambled over to the fridge and threw a bottle of tea at Gaara, even though Gaara already had a drink and wasn’t even thirsty.

“Any luck with that?”

Gaara shook his head.

“That makes two of us then,” the brunet said. “I hate this part.”

“Yes, it’s not the best.”

“Indeed,” the brunet said, and then he yawned.

“Are you going for a nap?”

“Yeah,” Neji nodded, lifting a hand in a salute as he sauntered down the hallway to his room.

Gaara watched him go, wondering why he wanted to join, and then returned to his writing paper. The two lines that he had added over the past hour jumped out at him, mocking, and he crossed them out with no further thought. What a drag.

 

**[Wednesday, 12 October: Smoking]**

The clock had chimed seven at night no more than two minutes ago. Gaara had been counting off the seconds in his head out of habit, hoping for inspiration to strike him and enable him to finish this stupid song. He had never hated storms so much. The ashtray on the table housed three used cigarettes, the only result of Gaara’s brainstorming.

The past week had been a little more successful. Well, successful in the aspect that they now had twelve demo songs. The only problem was that they still hadn’t met an agreement over which songs the vocalists were ready to sing, nor which ones the instrumentalists were willing to play, so the new songs had been added to the others and they were sitting around in the band lounge once again, writing and bickering and sleeping. Speaking of which, Gaara was getting more sleep than usual. There was little else to do, unless you were Naruto and Sakura, who insisted on playing video games whenever inspiration wasn’t forthcoming.

Sasuke has resigned himself to listening to music and writing. He was the most studious of all of them, but then again, he was an Uchiha, and Uchihas were meant to be perfectionists. His older brother was proof enough.

Gaara didn’t talk very much to the Hyūga, even though they had lived together for almost two months now. It was partly because he didn’t talk, but mostly because Hinata was shyer than anything, and Neji always made Gaara’s words stick in his throat.

As if on cue, the door opened and Neji stepped out clad in a white pullover and dark jeans. Gaara had to look away for a moment. His thought patterns hated him.

“Hi,” he said, regardless of his usual decision to leave the niceties to others.

“Hello,” Neji said, taking the seat opposite him.

He was holding a mug of chocolate.

Gaara wanted to ask if the brunet had slept well, or whether he had made any progress with the instrumental side of things, but he didn’t know how to start. Neji, blessedly, seemed not to be one for conversation, because he said no more, opting to sip his chocolate in silence. It was hard to find people like that.

In the end, the only thing that got him talking was when Gaara went to pull out another cigarette, and he said, “Your smoking habits are abysmal.”

Gaara paused, regarded the smoke in his hand and decided to bluff his way through, “I smoke once a day. Not even.”  _This is just a one-off that has never happened before because I have never been this bored before._

“Still disgusting.”

“Whatever.”

Sakura joined them, long pink hair pulled up into a lazy ponytail. It was one of the few times Gaara had decided to overlook her brash personality and admit that she was attractive.

“What are you two on about now?” she asked, stalking over to set two rice bowls down in front of them.

“The horror of this album.”

“Ugh, I _know_ ,” the pink-haired vocalist snorted. “Gods, it’s been such a drag. Pretty sure Ino is signing the divorce papers as we speak.”

“Quality time didn’t work?”

“That was two weeks ago, and my Get Out of Jail card just expired,” Sakura said, and motioned to the cigarette packet.

Gaara handed it over, too stunned to speak as she took one and lit up. “I didn’t know you smoked.”

“Surprise?” She made a face.

Gaara shrugged, picking up his chopsticks. He was a vocalist, not a linguist. They ate in silence, Gaara having a fleeting thought about Sakura and her skills in the kitchen. The teriyaki was very good.

“What are you working on?” Neji asked, nodding at the notepad in front of Gaara when the plates were mostly clear.

It had coffee stains on it, thanks to Naruto.

Gaara touched the edge of it carefully, “That one we started at the café.”

“Still?” Sakura said, before understanding flashed upon her countenance and she motioned towards the ashtray. “Is that why there’s so many?”

Gaara actually felt sheepish, “ _Hai_.”

“You’re going to die young,” Sakura said, but she couldn’t talk when she was smoking as well.

Neji flicked his fingers, “Let me see.”

Gaara passed the notebook over to him, unusually nervous. He was always confident in his song lyrics. The brunet hummed over the pages for a while, nodding in some places and tilting his head in others. Eventually he patted around the place, before looking up when Gaara gave him a pen.

“Thanks.”

Gaara contemplated lighting up the fourth cigarette and decided he wanted to live to see his twenty-first birthday, so the smoke remained untouched.

“Thoughts?” he asked softly, feeling as if breaking the silence was wrong.

“It’s pretty good.”

“ _Maji de_?”

“ _Maji, maji_.”

Neji’s hand moved across the page. Gaara tried to think of something other than how prominent the veins in the brunet’s wrist were, so he looked at Sakura instead, but she was busy watching the streets below them.

They were bustling with energy despite being late. Konoha was a busy city, always active, so unlike Sunagakure, which was much sleepier. Hotter too. Gaara hugged his arms tighter to himself in the cold.

The brunet worked for a minute or two longer—Gaara lost track of the seconds—and then pushed the pad at Gaara, “It’s fine.”

“Give it to me,” Sakura said, grabbing the notepad before Gaara could.

As she read, Neji gestured towards the smoke that Gaara had been turning over in his hands, “Are you always this indecisive?”

“Only when smoking is involved.”

Neji reached out and picked up the lighter on the table, beckoning him closer, “I’ll make the decision for you then, shall I?”

“If you must,” Gaara said, but he leant forward anyway and let Neji light the cigarette gripped between his lips. “Thought you hated smoking.”

“I do,” Neji replied. “I thought you hated talking.”

“Stalemate.”

Sakura shushed them and told them she was trying to concentrate, so Gaara kept to his cigarette and Neji to his chocolate. Gaara thought about his sister, and whether or not she was enjoying her honeymoon. A part of him, the vindictive one, hoped she was having an awful time, but the even more selfish one dwelled on the fact that whilst she was off celebrating her recent nuptials, he was sitting at a table with Neji.

 

**[Sunday, 9 October: Naruto’s Birthday]**

Despite Gaara’s previous vows to never drink again, he was drunk. The seven of them were at a nightclub celebrating Naruto’s twenty-first the next day, and for once, Gaara was grateful for the distraction.

Kakashi had finally approved the two demo songs Gaara had sent through, and the group had come to a consensus on six of the others that they were willing to keep working on. Gaara felt this was an appropriate stress reliever.

The music was loud, the smoke was thick, and he had lost count of how many drinks he’d had. Sitting at the table with him were Neji and Sasuke, both flushed, whether from the alcohol of the heat, Gaara didn’t know.

Hinata was dancing with Sakura, a fact that had surprised all of them. Three shots later had revealed that Hinata was a heavyweight, and they were all ignoring Sakura’s relationship woes, so the two danced without comment.

Gaara himself was nursing some foul drink that had all the colors of the rainbow in it, but his interest in it was more for show than anything else, considering his desire to vomit into the nearest available receptor if the other two hadn’t been present.

Naruto’s face swam into view then, blond hair damp again. It was feeling more and more like Temari’s wedding reception as the night progressed.

“Gaara,” he sang, voice all hazy and thick, and then Gaara was moving as Naruto pulled him to his feet. “Come dance.”

Gaara meant to say that he didn’t dance, and that he didn’t think he could cope with anything other than standing, but the words never sounded and Naruto was dragging him away from Sai, who sat with the other two, and Gaara was already in the crowd before his brain could catch up. Sakura and Hinata waved at him, all lipstick and teeth. They both looked pretty. People pressed against him from all directions and it was so much hotter here.

“You gotta dance,” the blond said.

“Why?” Gaara asked, unsure of how to react to the weird movements that his blond friend was doing. “How do you even dance?”

Naruto’s laugh was swallowed up by the noise of the music. “You just move. I can’t believe you’ve performed at concerts.”

That was different though. When he performed, he jumped around and sang and screamed and it felt natural. Here, in the club, with people everywhere and a tinny beat, moving felt forced and uncomfortable. He stayed still.

Naruto huffed another laugh, said, “Here,” and took his hands. “Just mirror me.”

It made Gaara frown, and then smile, “This is ridiculous.”

“It’s good,” Naruto argued.

Gaara was glad that he was drunk. Then he could blame his compliance with Naruto’s wishes on the alcohol, rather than pleasing his friend, although he considered the blond his closest companion. He thought of the other three sitting back at the table and lost his rhythm with Naruto for a moment as a thought occurred to him.

“Don’t tell me you’re doing this to make your boyfriend jealous.”

Naruto tilted his head in confusion, prompting Gaara to lean in closer and repeat himself. Then the blond grinned, “Don’t be stupid.”

“You’re the stupid one,” Gaara corrected. “And weird.”

“I’m  _drunk_ ,” Naruto said, as if it was the answer to everything. “And don’t say that. You’re weird too.”

“Yes, but I’m me. And you’re you.”

“Meaning?”

“I don’t know,” Gaara admitted, and Naruto fell into a spasm of laughter.

Gaara tried very hard not to grin, but it was difficult not to be happy around Naruto; his positivity was highly contagious.

“What’re the others doing?”

Gaara looked over to their table, throat tightening when not only Sasuke’s glare, but Neji’s met him too. He smirked at Sasuke (because he could, and because he was a little bitch) and then gave Naruto his attention again, since he didn’t have the guts to look at Neji again.

“They’re staring,” he answered.

“I’m going to be sick.”

“Not on me,” Gaara warned.

“ _Īe_ ,” Naruto agreed, before straightening up and patting Gaara on the shoulder. “Come with.”

Gaara shrugged and followed. They made it outside just in time for Naruto to stumble to the nearest wall and spend a good minute or two retching, long enough for Gaara to sit down properly. He sucked in the air, feeling as if he had been underground in a dusty cave for his entire life, and deciding that nothing had ever felt as good as oxygen.

Naruto was still dry heaving up by the time Gaara’s cheeks had cooled and his hair had stopped plastering itself to his forehead, so he dug around in his pockets for a cigarette, lighting it and dragging the smoke in deep.

“I love lung cancer,” Naruto said, voice hoarse. “Give me one.”

Gaara snorted at the blond’s oxymoronic attitude and held it up to him, watching Naruto suck in lungful after lungful of smoke with little rest between. He had never understood social smoking until his time with Seven Sins.

“Thanks,” Naruto tacked on the end of one breath.

“ _Hai_.”

“Didn’t see the girls, did you?”

“No. Only Neji and your boyfriend.”

Naruto gave him a tired scowl, but didn’t comment on the term. “What’s the time?”

Gaara shrugged, clueless. Naruto didn’t seem to care anyway, more concerned with smoking Gaara’s cigarette than anything else. Gaara was grateful for the silence.

“Whose idea was this?” Naruto lamented when his cigarette was no more than ash and filter.

“Not mine,” Gaara provided, wishing he had a bottle of water to wash away the residual taste of alcohol in his mouth.

“Eh,” Naruto said, holding out a hand. “Let’s go get the others, yeah?”

“Home?” Gaara asked, hopeful but trying hard not to show it.

He was unsuccessful, if Naruto’s grin was anything to go by. Jerk.

“Yeah, Gaara.” The blond looped an arm around Gaara’s neck. “Before you pass out like you did last time.”

“Shut up.”

Naruto’s laughter continued all the way back into the club. Hinata was at the bar with Sakura, giggling about something as the bartender poured them glasses of red liquid. Couldn’t be good for their health. Neither was smoking, actually.

Hinata saw him and beamed at him. _Him._ Her housemate who still was not brave enough to hold a full conversation with.

They joined the pair, Naruto ordering a whiskey and coke despite vomiting earlier. “Do you want anything, Gaara?”

“Nah.”

Naruto ordered for him anyway.

Sakura reached out and tugged on Gaara’s sleeve until he was close enough for her to put her arm around him. “Where did you guys disappear to?”

“Naruto vomited,” Gaara said bluntly.

Hinata laughed and then clapped a hand over her mouth, pale eyes wide with amusement. “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” Naruto assured her.

The cellist fixed her pale eyes on the blond, cheeks red and smile hesitant but there all the same, “You’re very nice, Naruto.”

Sakura rolled her eyes and leaned against Gaara, and he had no idea what to do. No one usually touched him, and now both Naruto and Sakura had within an hour.

They took their drinks away from the crush of the bar, Gaara peering into his glass and wondering what it was. Sakura still had her arm around him.

“Have you seen the boys?”

Gaara looked down at her, at the pink hair and green eyes. They looked like his, only his were paler and verging on blue, and she didn’t have the dark circles from lack of sleep either.

“We left them at the table.”

“Reckon we should get them,” Sakura yawned, patting around in her clutch for her phone. “Come outside. I’ll call Sasuke.”

For the second time that night, Gaara was dragged outside by someone. He could have put up a fight, but he was tired, and it was Sakura. He would follow her to the end of the world if she told him to—Naruto was the constant proof of what happened if Sakura didn’t get her own way. She was scary. Not that Gaara wasn’t. He just…didn’t like to be who he used to be.

Work. In. Progress.

“Gods, it’s cold,” Sakura said when they were outside.

This time, Gaara noticed the temperature drop far more and shivered, wishing he had brought a coat or something. The end of autumn was not the time to be loitering about in such thin clothing.

Sakura had already dialed Sasuke, and was tapping her foot impatiently as she waited for a reply. A minute passed, and then the pink-haired vocalist made a noise of frustration as she dialed again.

“Pick up your phone,  _baka_ ,” she said, before her expression changed. “Sasuke…”

Gaara tuned out, leaning against wall and folding his arms against the cold. He had a vague thought about making sandcastles, and then listening to Hinata play her cello. She was a beautiful cellist. He wondered when he would finally be able to hear her play. He hoped it was soon.

“Yeah, well—” Sakura was still talking. “Okay. Is Neji with you?  _Yeah_ , I’m not dumb. She’s with Naruto.”

Gaara raised a brow when she turned to him, and Sakura put her phone away.

“Why did you put your arm around me?” He said suddenly.

“What? Oh. I don’t know. It’s what friends normally do.”

“Are we friends?”

Sakura chuckled. “Aren’t we?”

“I don’t usually touch people.” Gaara snorted, adding, “They don’t usually touch me either.”

Sakura looked at him like he’d grown two heads. “Why not?”

“Don’t know.” Gaara shrugged. “It’s always been like that.”

Sakura was scuffing her shoes on the ground. “Is it…is it because of what happened at that concert of yours? Or since you were a kid? It’s okay if you don’t want to tell me.”

Gaara decided to blame his desire to tell her on being inebriated. “I think everyone knows I don’t get on with my siblings. I don’t think I ever have, not really.”

“But you’re in a band with them.”

“Only because of my father.”

“Isn’t he dead now though?” Her eyes went wide. “ _Sorry_. Gods, I need a filter.”

Gaara grinned in spite of himself. “It’s alright. But, it’s probably pretty hard for people to like someone with so many anger issues, you know?”

Sakura made a face and tapped his head. “Hey, if that’s self-pity, you better throw it in the garbage. Nobody has time for that.”

It felt like a slap in the face, but a gentle one, and he was half torn between swearing at her and agreeing her. _Patience_.

“No one’s ever told me that.”

“No one’s done a lot of things with you, apparently,” Sakura said wryly.

Gaara appraised her, and found it strange when he reached out and tugged on her wrist until she came closer, close enough for him to wrap his arms around her and bury his nose in her soft pink hair.

“You okay?” Sakura’s voice was light, but there was an undercurrent of something there that Gaara couldn’t be bothered identifying.

“Yeah,” he said, and he held her there, thinking of how much he wanted to hold Hinata like this too, and then of how Neji would fit into his arms, if ever he was allowed.

There were times when Gaara would watch the brunet and want nothing more than to thread his fingers through the brunet’s hair and push it over his shoulder.

Sakura was hugging back, Gaara realized after a moment. She was so warm. He couldn’t remember the last time someone had embraced him like this. It felt nice.

 

**[Friday, 21 October: Games Night]**

The next week passed by far too quickly. He spent Monday hugging the toilet bowl for a bit, initiated his first conversation with Hinata and managed not to fuck that up, and then somehow Wednesday blurred with Thursday and by Friday night they had three more demos.

Naruto had been playing around in the recording studio with the Hyūga and Sai with the demos they had already agreed on previously to try all week, so when he charged into the band lounge and threw video games at everyone, Gaara had to scramble to keep his notepad from being stepped on.

He had been trying to match his lyrics to one of Neji’s tunes. Not for the first time did he wish the others wrote songs his way.

“Move over,” Neji said, and then he motioned for Gaara to make room on the couch.

“Pushy,” Gaara retorted.

He didn’t play video games, not anymore, but he suspected that Naruto wouldn’t give him a choice to back out, because even Hinata had a game in her hands that she was studying intently.

“I bring food,” Sakura announced as she entered, placing pizza boxes and alcohol on the coffee table.

Sai brought over cups as Naruto set up the game and Sakura handed out slices.

“Gaara?” she asked. “What do you want?”

“Cheese?”

“Your lucky day,” she said with a Naruto smile and piled up a plate with cheese. “What about you, Neji?”

Neji was already chewing on a slice of Hawaiian pizza, the type that Gaara hated the most, and he held it up as an answer. Sakura took a plate for herself, then sat next to him and swung her legs into his lap.

He didn’t even need his mantra of patience, because it was not bad. Gaara’s reputation as a cold-hearted, self-centered brat was being destroyed, and he kind of didn’t mind.

“Eat,” Sakura prompted, socked feet pushing at Neji. “Neji’s beating you by two slices.”

“When was this a competition?” Gaara said with disinterest, but he took the plate Sakura provided him as Sai sat with Hinata on the other couch and Naruto and Sasuke took the floor.

“You’re skinny,” Sakura shot back.

Gaara kept eating. Naruto and Sasuke were already playing, the blond swearing far more often than the raven. Sasuke played like Gaara did, ruthless and dedicated, but sparing enough time to give jibes and insults.

It wasn’t so surprising, then, when Naruto died a short time later.

“You suck,” Sasuke told the blond.

Gaara couldn’t resist. “For you, yes.”

Naruto’s spluttered answer of outrage and Sasuke’s cold glare made the comment very worth it. Sakura let out a peal of laughter as Hinata giggled cutely behind her hand and Sai tilted his head, not getting the joke. His social skills were worse than Gaara’s, really, and that was saying something. Neji rolled his eyes.

“Whatever,” Naruto said in a thinly veiled attempt to look unaffected. “Gaara, Neji, it’s your turn.”

“I’m eating,” Neji protested, and Naruto gave him a look of mock exasperation.

“The girls, then.”

Sakura’s grin couldn’t have been wider.

Long story short, Hinata lost. Spectacularly. Gaara didn’t think she had ever played before, if the way Sai was constantly guiding her hands over the controller was any indication. Naruto was drinking some concoction of vodka and orange juice and he passed it on to Gaara, who took one sip of it and grimaced.

Neji wasn’t as negative, choosing to drink the cup that Naruto handed him before picking up the controller and saying, “Whenever you’re ready, Gaara.”

“ _Hai_ ,” Gaara said as smoothly as he could, even though his stomach was doing flips and he was praying to every god he knew of that he would remember how to win.

It was a weird game. Even weirder was the fact that Neji could play well enough to keep Gaara on his toes.

“Weak,” Gaara commented at one point, before narrowly avoiding getting killed.

“Weaker,” Neji retorted.

“Weakest,” Gaara finished when he beat the brunet by a narrow margin.

“Alright, you two,” Naruto said. “Gimme the controllers before you bash each other with them.”

Gaara did as Naruto asked and took another piece of cheese pizza for himself. Sakura had put her legs in his lap again, and she was busy watching Naruto and Sai play, red cup in hand. Neji curled into the couch as he watched the others, and Gaara let his eyes trace over the brunet’s form, lingering on the place where pale skin met clothing. He could almost imagine the pulse residing there. How tempting it was, to reach out and run his hands along the brunet’s shoulder until he could tuck his hand in the collar of that pullover.

He didn’t, though. He let his hand rest on Sakura’s ankle instead.

 

**[Monday, 15 February]**

**Album:**  Self-centered

 **Artist:** Bloody Sands

 **Genre:**  Metalcore

**Track-listing:**

  1. Shutting Up
  2. Unloved
  3. Touch
  4. Realizations
  5. Don’t Sleep
  6. Aftermath
  7. Sometimes
  8. Prisoner of War
  9. Cold and Dark
  10. Like That
  11. Winter Never Stings
  12. Perfect
  13. Lists
  14. Look Again



 

**[Wednesday, 26 October: Insomnia]**

It was times like this that Gaara really hated his body’s refusal to be normal and sleep.

The clock read two-fifteen in the morning and he was tired from joining Naruto and the others in the studio to fine-tune some instrumentals, but sleep was as evasive as ever and he had spent the last few hours staring at his ceiling.

So he got up.

The rest of the apartment was quiet, and he wrapped a coat around him before heading for the H&YM building. The Konoha cold, he decided, was far more unforgiving. Back in Suna, he would easily have gotten away by wearing a sweatshirt, yet here, he was wishing he had rugged up more.

At least it wasn’t a long walk.

Five minutes and quite possibly the beginnings of frostbite later, he was fumbling around to find the lights to the corridor. H&YM had eight recording studios, and Seven Sins’ one was right down the end. Gaara cursed when he couldn’t find the switch and used his phone instead.

The studio light was on. When he slipped into the sound booth, he saw Neji at the keyboard, eyes closed in concentration, hair falling about him and fingers slipping over the keys, not quite pressing down. Gaara could almost see the tune in Neji’s head.

He contemplated staying silent in the sound booth and just being an observer, but Neji opened his eyes suddenly and looked straight at him.

“Gaara,” he said, voice disembodied.

“Hi.”

Neji regarded him, then took his fingers off the keys and ran them through his hair instead, curling the locks over his shoulder to keep them out the way.

Gaara shifted, unsure. “Did I…were you working?”

Neji shook his head. “Not quite. Although I must ask you the same.”

“I don’t sleep.”

“I see.”

Gaara fidgeted with the bench top, wondering how it was possible for Neji to have an even stronger effect on him than Hinata did.

The brunet inclined his head, motioning for Gaara to join him.

“I had a song in my head,” the brunet said softly when they were seated together. “It’s from that latest album of yours.”

“ _Self-centered?_ ”

Neji’s hands were smooth and pale, light when they pressed down on the keys. “Mm. I thought it was fantastic. Very angry.”

Gaara didn’t know how to react to the praise, so he said, “Which song?”

“‘Perfect’.” Neji replied.

Gaara felt the words come out before he could stop them, “Play it?”

“I don’t know it,” Neji said, a hint of regret in his tone.

Gaara wasn’t disappointed. He wasn’t.

“But…I have another song. It’s not…I’ve been working on…it.”

“Tonight?”

“Yeah.”

Gaara didn’t wait. “Play that one then.”

Neji smiled, all bright teeth and pale eyes. He was so attractive.

He was also, Gaara decided shortly afterwards, an excellent pianist. If Hinata was perfect, then Neji was flawless, those long fingers of his spreading themselves out and dancing over the keys like white spiders, confident and familiar.

Gaara took it all in like a sponge: the concentration on Neji’s face, the surety of his hands, the stress in his wrists, the shift in his feet.

He didn’t recognize the song that the brunet played from any of the work on Seven Sins’ upcoming album, but it kept humming around him when Neji completed it and he missed it immediately. He wanted the brunet to play it again.

“What do you think?”

Gaara opened his eyes, looked at Neji. The brunet was oblivious, really.

“You want an answer?”

“I want you to sing.”

“Demanding,” Gaara said, feeling as if the two of them had already had this conversation.

“Very,” Neji grinned, took Gaara’s hands and set them upon the piano keys, “Did you like it?”

“Very much,” Gaara echoed. “Will you show me?”

“You  _are_  blind sometimes,” Neji tutted the same thought Gaara had been thinking about the brunet, pressing his fingers down where they rested on top. “I was going to.”

Gaara bit down on his tongue to stop from smiling. They played like that for a while, until Gaara could play the tune on his own without Neji pointing out the correct keys at regular intervals.

The sun was beginning to rise when they finally stopped, thanks to Gaara’s rebellious lungs. He hated yawning.

“I think it’s time for bed,” he said, standing and stretching.

There were kinks in his spine from sitting for so long and they cracked when he reached up, working them out. Neji was rubbing his eyes sleepily, hair falling into them.

Gaara thought about asking if Neji was going to write down the chords for the song, but the brunet spoke up first, “Keep it safe for me, Gaara.”

It felt secretive, like Neji was trusting him with something no one else was allowed to hear.

“Of course,” he said.

Neji nodded, stood with him. They left for their apartment, Gaara resisting the usual urge to run his hands through Neji’s hair, or ask him something stupid. He fell asleep with the tune burying itself into his memory.

 

**[Thursday, 10 November: Stress]**

The weeks were beginning to fly by, as if they were rushing towards the Christmas season. Sai left them for a few days to meet up with one of his childhood friends, and Gaara made a habit of eating breakfast with the Hyūga before they all went to H&YM. It was a good routine, and the album was starting to take on some sort of theme.

The others had already started to record instrumentals to add to the group of basic demos for Kakashi to voice his opinion on once preproduction rolled around, but they hadn’t gotten to adding lyrics yet, a fact that Gaara attributed to Sakura. The pink-haired vocalist had been decidedly quiet on the recording front, choosing instead to change the lyrics and complain about the bridge on one song in particular.

“You alright?” Gaara asked after she had snapped at Naruto.

It was the second time that day.

Sakura shook her head, and her fingers trembled as she smoked. Gaara lit one up himself, and they blew carcinogens at the city skyline. He understood why she was stressed, somewhat. He hadn’t heard a lot from his siblings, other than a few text messages to their group chat from Temari in several European landmarks, but he was beginning to appreciate what Sakura was going through.

“It’s the hours, isn’t it,” he said, but it wasn’t a question.

Sakura kept smoking and didn’t ask how he knew. “Yeah,” she scoffed. “How I’m never home, and I’m always disengaged, and I _must_ find her boring if I’m always on my phone.”

“Do you?”

“Of course not. I love her.”

Gaara tapped ash off and it floated down towards the city. “The others don’t really deserve your temper, though.”

Sakura sighed, flicked her cigarette and looped her arm through his. “When did you become so wise?”

Naruto joined them later, and Sakura gave him a hug as an apology and peace offering. The blond screwed up his nose and complained how they smelt of cigarettes. Sakura called him a hypocrite.

“Come inside. We’ll drink wine, you can relax, and you,” Naruto added, pointing at Gaara. “Can finally listen to Hinata.”

He didn’t need another incentive.

They sat around the lounge and listened to Hinata play her cello. Sakura opened the bottle of wine that Sasuke gave her, and filled her glass almost to the brim. Neji nursed a hot chocolate and leaned against Gaara, and it was very difficult to split his attention between the two Hyūga.

 “Gods, I hate wine,” Naruto said when Hinata had a drink break, even as he took a swig from Sakura’s glass.

The ruby red liquid swirled dangerously close to the edges when he returned the glass to her.

“You’re so uneducated, Naruto,” Sakura tutted.

Gaara looked around the room. They were all tired, but they seemed happy, and he was trying to figure out how that could be. He felt protective of them, even though he knew the others were more likely to save him first. Four months ago, he would have mocked anyone if they had suggested he would enjoy the company of others, and yet here he was, okay with touching people, finding the conversation interesting, and having a warm feeling in his chest. It wasn’t the wine.

“Play another one!” Naruto said, before grinning at the collective groan when he sat down with another bowl of instant ramen. “Aw, guys. You know me.”

Gaara spent most of his time watching, transfixed on the way Hinata’s fingers ran over the instrument, caring and intimate. A couple of times they would request songs, but mostly they let her play in silence. Then Naruto jumped up and came back with his guitar and Sasuke’s bass and the three of them had a go at creating some impromptu tunes.

“Sing, Gaara,” Naruto said at one point, but he shook his head.

“Sakura,” Gaara pleaded.

“ _Fine_ ,” she said, like he owed her big time.

Eventually the tunes petered out and Hinata kept yawning cutely, so they all called it quits at one and walked home, everyone breaking off at their respective streets with half-hearted promises to return to H&YM before noon. Eventually it was just the Hyūga and him.

Gaara took a deep breath and blurted out, “You were amazing, Hinata.”

She blushed. “Thank you.”

He bowed in acknowledgement, too tongue-tied to think of anything else to say. He had been living with her for so long, they talked every morning about the weather and the album, and yet no amount of praise could ever amount to how he felt about her. He was pathetic.

They arrived home and Hinata bade them goodnight before padding to her room. Neji sat down at the kitchen bench and picked at the grapes sitting on top of the fruit bowl. Gaara kept looking down. He didn’t want the brunet to know he stared at him sometimes. He was surprised he hadn’t been caught yet. Maybe he had. It had been a long four months. He could hardly remember all of it.

“All set for tomorrow?”

“Isn’t it today, considering it is one?”

“Semantics,” Gaara offered.

Neji’s smile made Gaara’s insides feel squirmy. “I guess. It’s all becoming the same thing, really. Wake up, record, edit, edit again, keep editing. I really want these demos to be out so we can get the ball rolling.”

“True.”

The brunet appraised him, for so long that Gaara felt his cheeks beginning to warm at the intensity. “You’ll get to sing soon.”

“Hn.”

“Ready?”

“Of course.”

Neji laughed softly, and pushed his thumb to Gaara’s cheek, “So confident.”

“Is that bad?”

“ _Īe_ ,” Neji said slowly. “I suppose not.”

He still had his hand against Gaara’s cheek. Gaara wanted to reach out and grab Neji’s long dark hair. There was a moment of silence, like neither of them knew what to say next, and Neji shifted his gaze from Gaara’s and then back up. For a moment Gaara thought the brunet could kiss him. He almost did it himself. All it would have taken was Gaara moving his head forward and he would have kissed the brunet.

He didn’t, though, because he wasn’t brave, because he had never been brave.

“Goodnight, Gaara,” Neji said eventually when neither moved, slipping off the stool.

Gaara watched him go, feeling like he had missed something important.

 

**[Monday, 14 November: Demo]**

Gaara thought Hinata was perfect. Her skills with the cello would have had him drooling, were he a lesser person. He wasn’t though, so he settled for staring into the distance and wishing he could take this feeling of happiness and tuck it away for later use.

The intercom crackled. “ _Gaara?_ ”

He blinked, recalled himself. “Huh?”

On the other end, Naruto sighed. “ _You missed your cue again. Keep up, yeah?_ ”

“I know,” Gaara said. “I just…”

“ _I know_ ,” Naruto said this time. “ _I had a feeling this would happen anyway_. _S’all good._ ”

Gaara cringed, regardless. “ _Sumimasen_.”

“ _All good. Just keep up. We’ll go again. And five…four…_ ”

Gaara shut his eyes, tuned his ears in and waited, preparing for the tide.

“… _three, two, one._ ”

They were finally recording him and Sakura, and with the promise of preproduction creeping closer, he was both nervous and relieved. The music slid around him, dipping into his headphones and swirling there. Gaara stilled, forced himself to stay in the same spot and not let the current wash him away. The music swelled, took hold of him, and peaked. His cue. He began.

It was so much easier to sing, to lose yourself to the tune and the lyrics and forget about anything else for a while.

Another wave rolled past and Gaara picked up on it and rode it for as long as possible, feeling the stretch on his vocal cords and pushing it. Hinata’s tune was pooling in his ears. The drumbeat behind it was making Gaara cold. He shivered, kept on.

Gaara liked to think of singing like swimming in the ocean. He had only ever swum at the beach twice before, but his thoughts on it remained the same. He took a deep breath as another crest came and he rode on the lip of it, keeping himself there before dipping back down until the wave petered out.

“ _Man. That was…awesome._ ” He could almost hear Naruto’s grin. “ _Too bad it’s still a demo._ ”

Gaara coughed around a smile, and took his headphones off before opening the door. “Can we do clean later? My throat is fucked.”

“Yeah, man,” Naruto said, “I’ll get Sakura to go next.” The blond’s grin was as large as Gaara had envisaged. “You wanna hear it?”

He shook his head, then noticed that Naruto had not been alone during recording. Damn. He didn’t like being heard unless it was the final product. The extra presence always made him double guess. Neji didn’t say anything though; he smiled slightly and inclined his head at Gaara to follow him. Gaara couldn’t decide if he liked Neji more or less for that.

They found their way to the studio’s kitchen and Neji dug out a tub of ice cream, feeding Gaara a spoonful with a murmured, “don’t talk yet” _._  It was mint. Gaara wondered if the brunet knew it was his favorite flavor. Probably not.

 _Thanks_ , he motioned anyway and Neji’s smile grew a bit more.

“You were…” the brunet started, then broke off when Gaara raised a silent brow. “…adequate, I suppose.”

Gaara snorted, then winced when he tasted blood in the back of his throat.

“Oops,” the brunet drawled.

Gaara took the spoon off him and kept eating ice cream, digging away at the chocolate chips. He blessed the gods that ice cream existed. Neji was regarding him with something akin to amusement, but it wasn’t quite that either. Gaara questioned him silently and Neji shook his head.

“I’m kidding, of course,” the brunet said. “It was great.” He waited before continuing, “Naruto’s quite taken with your voice, isn’t he?”

Gaara nodded.

“But Sasuke,” Neji said casually, and Gaara didn’t need to answer that with either a nod or a word. “Naruto’s a lot more taken with him than your voice, don’t you think?”

“Sasuke’s too stubborn.” _We all know that_.

“They’ll work it out. Eventually. If it hasn’t already.” Neji paused, before taking Gaara’s spoon and having some of the ice cream itself. “This is possibly the first thing I’ve found to have in common with you, Gaara.”

He was very pleased.

There was a moment of silence, as if Neji was trying to figure out what to say, and it was made longer by Gaara’s usual reluctance to converse within half an hour of him recording. His voice needed some semblance of rest.

Neji didn’t end up saying anything. Naruto bounded in with exclamations of how great the recording sounded and how much he loved Gaara for agreeing to do the album, and then Sai entered with Sasuke and Hinata, advising them that Sakura was about to begin recording her part.

So they all watched her, and Gaara felt a little proud of her too. He caught Neji’s gaze from across the sound room. It was warm and dark, it made things fuzzy around the edges, and to Gaara, it was most welcome.

 

**[Thursday, 17 November: Preproduction]**

The next week went like this: Gaara sang with Sakura on the next thirteen demos, the others did rough cuts of instrumentals for them, and before they knew it, they were in front of Kakashi with twenty-five basic demo tracks and _finally_ staring preproduction in the face.

Four hours later, a lot of talking and whiteboard markers later, they had twelve tracks to work with.

Gaara felt a bit giddy, really.

 

**[Monday, 21 November: Photoshoot]**

Patience. Work in progress. Patience. Work in progress. Patience. _Work in progress._

Gaara had good days and bad days; the good ones, he was finding, were spent with the others. He didn’t need his mantra then. The bad ones required a little more work, and such a time was now.

He was doing his very best to sit still as the makeup artist Sachi worked on him. His eyes were itchy and he really wanted to rub them, but she was patting eyeshadow underneath and he didn’t think she’d appreciate him messing up her work. Above him, the hairdresser Akira was attacking him with a comb.

“Close your eyes for me,” Sachi said gently, pressing down on the corner when he did and drawing the pen across his eyelid.

Gaara felt the quick brush of something after the liner, and then almost sneezed when she pressed powder along his cheeks and nose

“ _Īe!_ ” she scolded. “Keep your eyes shut. Just a little longer.”

Akio tugged the comb through his hair and snagged on a tangle.

He hated this.

Seven Sins’ publicist Kurenai was a fierce women and with the band finally passing preproduction, she could finally begin her role. The first step was to properly introduce Seven Sins’ collaborating artists, she had reasoned, so she booked himself and the Hyūga with _Kunai!_ for a cover page story in the December issue.

“I wish I had your skin,” Sachi complained, buffing cream blush onto his cheeks. “So clear.”

Gaara could hear Neji in the next chair chuckling. Bastard.

“Eyes closed!” Akio said, applying a large amount of hairspray. “Better.”

“Nice work,” Sachi beamed, brushing powder off Gaara’s face and asking him, “What do you think?”

Gaara stared at his reflection, took in the carefully styled hair and the darkly lined eyes and the too perfect skin. He didn’t think he’d ever get used to photoshoots.

“Thank you.”

“You look amazing,” Akio said, and Gaara wondered if they were always this positive.

“Well, get on over to wardrobe!” Sachi clapped her hands. “Neji, Hinata, you too…”

Gaara gave her a small bow and wandered out before the others, self-conscious. The two people in wardrobe were also rays of sunshine and they handed him his first outfit. He hoped he didn’t get makeup on the collar and ruin it.

Hinata stepped out from the other side of the partition wearing a white dress. She looked beautiful. He told her as much, and she smiled sweetly at him.

“You’re too kind.”

Neji entered five minutes later, looking irritated and incredible as he apologized for taking his time.

“It’s alright, brother,” Hinata said, placing a hand on his sleeve.

Gaara didn’t say anything. He couldn’t stop staring at Neji.

“Alright, you three!” the head photographer, a flamboyant young man with thick eyebrows and wide eyes waved at them as he bounded over on the longest legs Gaara had ever seen. “Thank you so much for joining us today. You all look fantastic. Did you get taken care of in the makeup department?”

“I can’t feel my face,” Neji deadpanned.

The photographer found this hilarious, apparently, since he laughed loudly. “Well you look beautiful! Three deities to photograph. I love it!”

Gaara scowled.

“My name is Rock Lee,” the enthusiastic photographer continued, turning to Gaara. “Naruto has told me all about you.”

“Lee…” Gaara frowned, wondering why the name sounded familiar.

That, and the lurid green…jumpsuit, that the photographer was wearing. There really was no other word for it.

“I was at your sister’s wedding, Gaara-sama,” Lee beamed. “She looked like a dream. But enough about that. We’re here to do a photo shoot.”

Lee walked them over to the white background and arranged them how he pleased, seating Hinata and having Neji and Gaara flank her.

“We’ll do the first shot like this. Don’t think too hard about it. Ignore the fact I’m here. Lighting!”

The next few minutes passed with several extras swarming around Lee and making sure he had everything he asked for. It took all of Gaara’s willpower not to blink as Lee took shots. At least it was easy to look disinterested. Apparently his normal expression was what Lee wanted.

“Perfect! Neji, can you step in closer to Gaara? Gaara, hands in your pockets. _Lean…_ that’s it. One more time…”

Another series of shots, and then they were moved again for the next series. Gaara’s arm was beginning to ache where he had it pressed into the wall. Neji was in a similar position, head tilted back and one leg bent up to push against the wall. Hinata was on the outside this time, taking up the foreground.

Lee took a moment to flick through his camera, and then frowned, running over to Hinata and adjusting her arms to another angle, although Gaara wasn’t sure how many angles you could get with folded arms.

“Just one more!” Lee said as he raced back to his camera.

Gaara sighed. He had never been such a rigorous a photo shoot before. The very few he had done hadn’t lasted more than half an hour, and they were probably pushing the two-hour-mark now.

“Drink break!” Lee decided eventually. “Head back to wardrobe so you guys can change into outfit number two. Can I get a fan in here?”

They redressed, Sachi accosting Gaara before he could drink to dab powder on his nose.

“Sorry about Lee,” she said. “He’s a little zealous.”

“A little?”

Sachi shrugged. “It’s one word for it.”

The three of them returned to Lee, who directed them to sit on the floor. Hinata leaned back against Gaara’s legs, and it had to be uncomfortable, but she didn’t complain. Neji sat next to them, grimacing.

“You can smile for this one!” Lee said.

“At what?” Neji said under his breath and Hinata giggled.

“Something.”

Gaara looked at Neji, found it hard to breathe, and ran his hand through Hinata’s hair, “This feels weird. Does it feel weird?”

“A little,” Hinata admitted.

She was talking a lot more than usual, either out of nervous energy or because she had grown comfortable around Gaara. He didn’t think he was there yet but it was close. Neji bickered about feeling fake, glaring up at Lee when he shouted out some encouragement. He still looked amazing.

“Say something,” Gaara prompted when Lee told them to tone down on the haughtiness. “I don’t smile.”

“I’ve seen you smile,” Hinata disagreed, shifting her head slightly and baulking when Lee yelled at her to move back.

Gaara snorted, causing Hinata to giggle again and Neji to chuckle. “I really want to itch my eyes.”

“It would be a shame to ruin your makeup artist’s work,” Neji agreed. “You look good.”

“Yeah?”

“Better than good,” Neji nodded, and he took Hinata’s hand.

Lee shouted words of positivity from behind his camera and Gaara felt like laughing at the absurdity, but he didn’t, because it still hurt to laugh. He had recorded with Sakura again yesterday and his throat was still feeling the aftereffects.

“How long do you reckon he’s going to keep us?” Neji queried.

“As long as possible,” Hinata said in her usual quiet voice, beaming at her cousin.

Gaara felt like an intruder.

Lee came into view then, camera in hand as he captured them several times. His use of enthusiastic adjectives was making Gaara devise murder strategies for him. Currently the best one was crushing all of the raven’s bones until he couldn’t walk again.

“Brilliant! Next shot!”

Gaara hung his head in resignation. Mass murder sounded like the way to go now.

It went that way for a long time, until finally, Lee decided he wanted one more shot and that it was the ultimate shot, the last one ever, promise. So Gaara let Lee move his arm to hold Hinata and rest his elbow on Neji’s shoulder, and repeated his mantra in his head.

“Wonderful!” Lee crowed and took longer than he promised to photograph them.

Gaara looked up at Neji at one point and let himself smile. The brunet’s lined eyes were warm again, and he still looked incredible.

“Splendid!” Lee sang, crawling onto his stomach and taking the photo like that. “Last one, I swear on my life.”

[#]

Much later than expected (and promised), Gaara stood with Neji and Hinata and they all made their way back to makeup and hair. Sachi wiped the makeup off his face, tutting at the stubborn mascara when it stayed in his undereye area.

“When you get home, use some moisturizer.”

“Okay,” Gaara muttered. “Thank you, for today.”

“ _Hai_ ,” she beamed. “You’re very welcome.”

Gaara bowed again and left. Hinata was back in the lilac frock she had worn to the shoot, and she was donning her trench coat.

Neji was with her, and he said, “Looks like some of your eye makeup wanted to stay.”

Gaara shook his head at the taunt, grinning, as he felt around for his own coat and shrugged it on.

“My friends!” Lee said as he joined them, arms wide. “I must give you my utmost thanks, and sincerest apologies for keeping you so long. Please accept my invitation to dinner!”

“Uh…” Gaara and Neji chorused, but Hinata smiled cutely at Lee.

“ _Arigatō_ , Lee-sama,” she said. “We would be honored.”

Lee’s grin was large enough to rival Naruto’s signature one. No wonder they were friends.

A short while later, they were in an overpriced restaurant in the heart of the city. Lee was quite the character, urging them to order whatever they wanted as he drank a glass of water.

Gaara pondered why the raven didn’t choose the default choice of alcohol when eating out, and ordered to keep the rest of the table satisfied, even though he wasn’t very hungry. Hinata was tucking into a complicated wagyu dish, and Neji had chosen an exotic rice bowl, whilst Lee ate noodles and talked ten-to-the-dozen about his field of work and how much he appreciated the three of them coming in to do the shoot.

“It was a marvelous idea,” he said. “Kakashi rang up my good friend Gai to see if he would do the job, but he was busy, so you all got passed onto me instead.”

“Were they to your liking?” Neji questioned.

“They were gorgeous,” Lee said emphatically. “You’ll get your prints as soon as I’m finished with them. Shouldn’t take longer than a week.”

“ _Hai_.” Gaara answered.

“You said you knew Naruto,” Neji started, chopsticks poised.

“I did,” Lee beamed. “It’s thanks to Sasuke, really. I had to get a shot of Sasuke. He was perfect.”

“And then?”

“Naruto was outraged. He wanted to be doted on too, but you see, Sasuke was like an Adonis. Marble skin, dark hair, obsidian-black eyes.” Lee chuckled, “Of course, it was also because I wanted to photograph Sakura as well.”

“Ah,” Neji said in understanding, even though it was quite clear that none of them knew what the raven was on about.

“She was so beautiful. All that pink hair. Amazing.”

Gaara raised a brow in disinterest.

“The makeup department did well,” Lee nodded, not giving any answers. “Those prints will be wonderful.”

The conversation progressed, Gaara constantly overwhelmed by the amount of enthusiasm that Lee possessed. He didn’t tire of it, clearly, and it was so much that Gaara could have said it was groveling, but Lee was so earnest that he couldn’t.

The night ended on a good note, and the three of them returned to the apartment, talked out and tired.

“Goodnight, Gaara,” Hinata said, hand brushing on his shoulder.

Neji smirked at him and bade him goodnight too, and Gaara was left grinning at the ceiling like an idiot, feeling like they’d all grown closer.

 

**[Sunday, 11 December: Shopping]**

Neji barged into Gaara’s room two weeks later without any invitation, ignorant of Gaara’s attempt at reclusiveness and announcing something that Gaara missed because he had his headphones in and they were blasting Hinata’s music.

“You,” Neji repeated when Gaara had freed his ears. “You’re coming shopping with me.”

“What for?”

“Christmas is around the corner.”

Gaara had forgotten as well. “Oh.”

“Yes. Plus, Naruto just asked me why I hadn’t put my presents under the tree yet.”

Gaara winced when he remembered the tree the seven of them had erected on Monday in the band lounge thanks to the blond. It was crooked at best, but Naruto and Sakura loved it and had already stashed their gifts under it.

Neji waved in the general direction of the door, “Shall we?”

They chose one of the less popular shopping centers, and when Gaara caught a glance of Neji on the front cover of  _Shuriken_ , he wondered if he could buy it without the brunet noticing. Neji was busy rifling through some CDs, picking for Naruto. Gaara looked at the issue again. How tempting.

The next store they visited was not one Gaara had anticipated.

“Teddy bears?” he asked, standing in the middle of the room and looking at the shelves.

“Hinata,” Neji explained, immediately picking out a lavender-colored one with white bows. “She likes them.”

“Ah,” Gaara said in understanding. “What should I get her then?”

Neji gave him a knowing look, like he had foreseen this. “Accessories. I’ll get the bear, you get the clothes.”

“That’s a very large bear.” Gaara observed, picking out clothes that he figured would go with it.

Neji was not impressed, “It’s the size of a pillow.”

“Ferocious,” Gaara agreed.

“Roar,” Neji deadpanned and they both smiled.

So far so good. Gaara hadn’t seen any paparazzi around, and the shopping center wasn’t as crowded as it could be, despite being so close to Christmas. Neji was swinging his purchases in his hand, and Gaara stepped closer to him, let their elbows brush.

“Hungry?”

“You?”

“I could eat.”

“Hungry then,” Neji decided and they wandered around, searching for a ramen shop.

The first one they went to was closed, and the second one full of people, so they kept looking until Gaara finally consulted one of the center maps for guidance. They found one on the other side of the center and made their way over to it, Neji complaining about the horrid layout of the shopping center and Gaara humming his agreement, feeling at peace.

It was a cozy place, full of red and white and they ordered ramen with a green tea for Gaara and barley for Neji. Gaara questioned the brunet on the choice of beverage. Neji said something about it being less bitter.

“Sweet tooth?”

“A little,” Neji turned a bit pink behind his teacup.

Gaara ate his noodles in amused silence.

The rest of the day was spent making sure they had an equal amount of presents for every individual, and then Neji dragged Gaara off to an ice cream bar, ordering mint chocolate for the two of them.

“The only thing we have in common,” Gaara said, more out of reciting the memory to himself than reminding Neji.

They were sitting on the shopping center’s esplanade, feet dangling in the water and shoes off near the side with their bags. Gaara wanted Neji to play the song again.

“We have plenty in common,” Neji argued anyway.

“We don’t,” Gaara disagreed.

“We’re both antisocial.”

“Touché.”

“We’re both musical.”

“Now you’re just stating the obvious.”

Neji batted away Gaara’s prodding spoon from his face. “I’m trying.”

“Do you like sandcastles?”

Neji tilted his head to the side, as if he was recalling a forgotten event. “You know, you said that when I first met you.”

“Good gods,” Gaara muttered. “I don’t want to think about that.”

Neji’s smile was kind, “It was kind of cute.”

Gaara focused on his ice cream and the task of finding chocolate chips. “Was it?”

Neji didn’t answer for a moment. “But yes, I like sandcastles.”

“Unbelievable.”

“Make one with me sometime.”

“ _Tabun_ ,” Gaara said evasively.

Neji pushed his thumb into Gaara’s cheek, the same spot he had touched that time before in the kitchen all those weeks ago. Gaara had never wanted physical contact so much before. He wished Neji would do something other than stare at him this time. He wished Neji would look at him like that all the time.

He wished a lot of things.

 

**[Friday, 16 December: Snow]**

Recording was taking a toll on his voice. Sakura was on the warpath to making everything perfect, and Naruto and Sasuke weren’t talking, so it was up to the rest of them to make the group happy. Hinata hid behind her headphones and cello practice most of the time. Gaara chose to stay in his room whenever he wasn’t needed. Neji and Sai spent their time with Naruto, working on music editing with Kakashi, so Gaara didn’t see anyone very often.

For the first time ever, Gaara was sleeping. Not nearly as much as normal humans did, but much more than usual. Despite that, tonight was not one of those nights. Gaara had been in a group Skype call with his siblings, catching up with them. Temari was travelling around South America now, completely loved-up, and Kankurō was busy preparing to tour with Starving Marionettes. Gaara had told them the basics about the album, and when they had ended the call, he reflected on the fact that it hadn’t been too bad.

His bedroom door cracked open without warning, and then Neji appeared.

Gaara took out his earphones, confused and annoyed that he hadn’t tidied his room. “Hi.”

“Come with,” Neji motioned with his head.

Gaara didn’t question where, just stood and pulled on a maroon pullover. Neji had gotten Gaara’s coat from the door and was already wearing his trench coat, scarf wrapped snugly around his throat. Gaara copied him silently and they exited swiftly, making it to the elevator. They didn’t talk.

The night was bitterly cold when they stepped into it, and Gaara cursed under his breath, condensation floating before him as he did.

“It’s cold,” he shivered, wishing he’d had the foresight to wear two pullovers, even three.

“It’s winter,” Neji replied.

“Time?”

“Around two,” the brunet said, knocking shoulders with him. “Wanted to get out for a bit.”

“Could’ve gone by yourself.”

Neji nodded, “I could have. But I wanted you too.”

Gaara’s insides felt warm at the statement, and he hid his mouth under his scarf to keep his teeth from chattering, “What are we doing then?”

“I don’t know,” Neji said. “What do you want to do?”

It wasn’t snowing, but there were layers of fresh snow on the ground, and it crunched beneath their feet as they walked.

“Snow castles,” Gaara said randomly, raising a brow when Neji sank to his knees at the statement. “What…what are you doing?”

“You said you wanted to make snow castles,” Neji explained. “So we’re making snow castles.”

“You can’t be serious.”

Neji threw a pile of snow at him. Gaara brushed it off and knelt with the brunet, complaining how snow wasn’t half as good as sand.

“We can’t all come from the desert,” Neji chided as he packed in snow. “But this is pretty terrible.”

“How do you cope?” Gaara said, frowning at the consistency. “It’s so crunchy. And wet.”

“We make igloos and snowmen,” Neji pointed out, still smiling. “Not castles.”

That made sense. Gaara sneezed, and then Neji lunged forward, was on him, was over him, fingers finding all the ticklish spots on Gaara’s ribs as they writhed in the snow, struggling to breathe.

“Stop, stop,” Gaara gasped, sneezing again.

Neji laughed and didn’t listen, until finally Gaara’s sneezing turned into a coughing fit and he rolled onto his side to fight it out. His throat was crying. He could feel it, and there was the residual taste of blood.

“I hate you,” Gaara wheezed when he turned back.

He always wheezed, but this was more like the croak of a dying frog. So very unattractive.

Neji lay on his side, propped up by his elbow. “You could never hate me.”

Gaara didn’t answer, uncomfortable with the words running around in his head. Neji dragged his fingers up Gaara’s side, much like the way he had with Hinata’s hand during the photo shoot, except that Gaara didn’t think Hinata’s heart had been about to jump out of her chest, nor her cheeks go quite as red. It was slow and deliberate, and Gaara looked away from the brunet’s pale gaze, uncomfortable at the intensity he saw then.

Eventually he huffed out a chuckle when Neji’s fingers pressed in at the right place, “Stop…”

“You’re more fun than Naruto,” Neji grinned wickedly, fingers continuing their assault.

“ _Neji_. Gods.”

The brunet backed off, amused as Gaara curled into the fetal position and bit down on the inside of his cheek. “Evil.”

It was Neji’s turn not to answer. They lay there in the snow, Gaara giving up on caring about the cold when Neji inched closer and pressed along his side. Somewhere tonight, Gaara thought, his sister was most likely asleep with her new husband. His brother had probably hit the nightclubs with Deidara and Sasori, and maybe Inuzuka Kiba too, since the pair were close friends.

Neji stirred. “Must you always think so loudly?”

“Yes.”

The brunet pressed closer before settling again. “First single gets released today.”

As if Gaara had forgotten that crucial information. He let Neji know as much.

“Omission,” the brunet said slowly, trying the word out the way one would try out clothes before they bought them.

Gaara muffled another sneeze into his scarf.

“Do you want to go to H&YM?”

“Yes,” Gaara said, and then sneezed again.

He hadn’t known he was so sensitive to cold before, but then again, he was from Suna. Neji stood, brushed snow out of his hair and pulled Gaara up. They both patted the majority of snow off Gaara’s coat before trudging back onto the path, hands tucked deep into their pockets and scarves wrapped tight around their mouths. Gaara tried very hard not to fantasize about holding Neji’s hand.

 [#]

The sky was lightening when they made their way to H&YM. Gaara couldn’t feel his nose anymore, and his fingers and toes felt numb as well, making him uncoordinated. They piled into the lift, snow melting on their clothes before entering the band lounge.

Naruto was sitting at the kitchen bench playing on his phone. “Mornin’,” the blond said softly.

Neji pushed a mug of hot chocolate at Gaara, which Gaara took gratefully and wrapped his hands around it, warmth seeping in.

“You’re up early,” the brunet commented.

Naruto dipped his head, cradling his own cup. It was filled with something black and strong. “Couldn’t sleep. Too nervous.”

“They’ll love it.”

“Gods, I hope so,” Naruto said, tipping his head back to swallow his drink before cracking his neck. “’Kashi has scheduled us in to shoot the Oneroi music video tomorrow. Shouldn’t take more than a day or two.” The blond yawned and rubbed his eyes. “Gods. This fucking single. I’m too nervous.”

Gaara folded his arms on the bar and rested his chin on them, nervous as well. At least he was warm now.

 

**[Friday, 16 December]**

**Album:** Omission – Single

 **Artist:**  Seven Sins

**Tracklisting:**

  1. Omission



 

**[Saturday, 17 December: Music Video]**

The day was colder than ever. At least Gaara wasn’t sneezing like yesterday. It had snowed all night, and now there was enough snow on the ground to build a giant castle. He hadn’t gotten Neji alone to do so yet.

“Fuck, it’s cold,” Sakura grumbled, blowing into her cupped hands and rubbing them together.

She was wearing a black jumper, far too thin for traipsing around in the snow with, but that’s what wardrobe had gone with so Gaara had said nothing when they had given him a similar outfit. The single Seven Sins had released on Thursday had been very successful, with Naruto and Sakura running around the apartment screaming the minute it was uploaded to their iTunes and Spotify. Neji had made tea for everyone and Hinata had sat on the couch with Gaara, sleepy-eyed and yawning into the sleeve of her oversized pullover. Gaara would have joined in the excitement, except he didn’t want to appear so vulnerable, especially in front of Sasuke. The raven had spent his time shaking his head at his band members.

Their director, Rock Lee, came sprinting over, still possessing the longest legs and wearing the green jumpsuit. On top of it he had donned a thick green vest and orange boots. Gaara wanted to ask him why he insisted on subjecting them to hypothermia.

“Aren’t you two spectacular?” he said, patting Sakura and Gaara on the shoulder.

Gaara turned his thoughts down less dangerous paths, like who else could have done the shoot instead of the raven.

“Anyway, I know the storyboard is jumping all over the place but I thought we’d do the two-shot of you first,” Lee explained, demonstrating enthusiastically with his hands. “Sakura, you’ll walk here,” he said as he positioned the pink-haired vocalist. “And straight down. Gaara,” he motioned to him. “You’ll be standing here, and then on my cue start walking. We’ll do Sakura’s lines first.”

“Lines,” Gaara echoed.

“ _Hai_ _!_ ” Lee saluted him. “I know it’s colder than the Arctic, but cold weather is good for building up one’s tolerance to temperature extremes!”

Sakura snorted. “Gee, no shit, Lee.”

Lee shook his head in mock exasperation at her, “Sakura, you are strong! You don’t need my encouragement. If you two do well the first take, it shouldn’t take too long after that.”

“You said that last time,” Gaara reminded him.

“I promise, this time,” Lee bowed, scurrying back to the film crew. “On my life!”

[#]

Gaara’s teeth were about to chatter themselves out of his skull. He had been plied with drinks and hot water bottles, but the cold felt bone-deep. Sakura’s nose was a bright pink and she was beginning to sniff, much to the annoyance of the makeup department.

“Don’t pass it on,” Gaara warned her, even though it was Lee’s fault if he did catch it.

The raven had forced Gaara against a tree and then planted Sakura next to him, claiming great rewards were in sight since it was the last shot. It had been a very, very long day full of wardrobe changes and retakes and voice going hoarse with the repetitive singing. The sun would be setting soon, which was what Lee wanted to capture, but Gaara was ready to crawl into bed.

“I’ll try,” Sakura said, before sneezing into her gloves. “Oh my gods. How long does this have to take?”

 _Not too much longer_ , Gaara thought grimly. The jeans he wore were thick, but they weren’t stopping the cold at all. He hoped he would be able to stand after this. Sakura shifted, her pink hair nowhere near as soft as Gaara remembered as it brushed against his chin. He supposed he could thank the hairspray. His own hair felt like cardboard.

Sakura shifted again and Gaara smirked, shaking his head. Here he was, sitting in the snow with a girl he hadn’t liked very much six months ago, filming a music video for a band that he hadn’t wanted to collaborate with.

“I gather he’s always like this.”

“Yes,” Sakura said, stifling a yawn. “Every single shoot I do with him.”

“Do you know each other very well?”

Sakura smiled. “He had a crush on me _ages_ ago.”

Gaara couldn’t ever see that happening. “Speaking of, how is Ino?”

Sakura looked straight ahead and did not answer for a long time. “Gods, will he ever give up? Lee! I’m getting frostbite here!”

Their director yelled more encouragement.

“Did I overstep the mark?” Gaara asked, worried.

“I don’t want to talk about her,” Sakura shook her head, and curled against him like a cat. “How’re you and Neji?” she said, and Gaara frowned at her. “What? Don’t think we all haven’t noticed.”

“Noticed what?”

“You and Neji,” Sakura said, teeth showing. “You have a thing.”

“‘A thing’?” Gaara repeated, clueless.

“Yes,  _baka._  A thing.”

Miffed at the insult, Gaara’s frown deepened. Sakura laughed, then rested her head on his shoulder again. She was a welcome change in temperature, and he commented on her warmth.

“And you’re cold,” Sakura returned, laughing again. “But you changed the subject. You and Neji should go out.”

“Yeah?”

Sakura regarded him with bright eyes. She was still pretty with the flushed cheeks and green eyes and long lashes, and Gaara liked it when she took his hand in hers. Touch was…comforting.

“I think you should,” she said with a tone of finality.

“ _Tabun_.”

 

**[Monday, 26 December]**

**Album:** Oneiroi – Single

 **Artist:**  Seven Sins

**Tracklisting:**

  1. Oneiroi



 

**[Friday, 23 December: Homecoming]**

Despite his conversation with Sakura, Gaara didn’t talk to Neji about anything meaningful. They didn’t converse very much anyway, but whenever they did in the week that followed, it stuck strictly to topics like Naruto’s ridiculous taste in friends (Rock Lee, for example) and Hinata’s shyness (which had gotten better in the making of the album, apparently) and Sai’s drawings (magnificent things).

Then Gaara’s sister called him.

“Temari,” he said by way of greeting.

“ _Gaara_ ,” his sister replied. “ _How’s it going up your end?_ ”

“Productive.”

“ _That’s great_ ,” Temari said, and it sounded genuine. “ _Listen, we’re heading home now._ ”

Gaara waited for her to continue, before realizing that she wasn’t going to, and then he was faced with the dilemma of wondering what to say in answer to that. “Um.” He wracked his brains, pulled up a sentence he had heard Naruto use: “That’s nice. When is your flight?”

“ _Tomorrow, actually,_ ” Temari said. “ _I wanted to check in with you if that was alright?_ ”

“Really?”

“ _Yeah. Is that okay? Unless you’re bogged down with promotional work._ ”

Gaara looked around the band lounge, then reflected on what he had been spending the past few hours doing—listening to Hinata and writing poems and trying to track down Neji on the web, although all he had was a couple of videos of a much younger Neji playing at school events and an outdated page with a sixteen-year-old Neji’s information on it. It was obviously fan made.

“No,” he said slowly, shutting his laptop before he could stalk the brunet on Google any further (for the moment, at least). “No, it’s…that’s okay. I’m not…busy.”

“ _Awesome. I can’t wait to see how you’re all doing. The music video looked brilliant._ ”

Gaara almost groaned, “You watched it.”

“ _Yeah,_ ” Temari said matter-of-factly. “ _Of course I did._ ” There was another pause, and then a hesitant, “ _You and Sakura…I mean, you have my full support regardless, but are you two…?_ ”

“A thing?” Gaara echoed.

“ _Yeah._ ”

“No.” _I have someone else_.

“ _Oh. Oh! Okay._ ” Temari chuckled a little, but it was strained. “ _Well that’s alright. It’s just…you two looked very comfortable with each other. Shika and I wondered…I mean, it’s not as if you’re—_ ”

“Touchy-feely.”

“ _Y-yeah. Um…_ ”

“She’s…a friend,” Gaara told her. “A very good friend.”

“ _Oh. That’s good. Isn’t it?_   _Extending your friendship circle beyond Naruto.”_

Gaara rubbed his temple, feeling a building headache. “I guess.”

“ _Yes.”_

Outside he could hear Naruto and Sasuke arguing about something. Probably another trivial issue, again. Their bickering had become more apparent in the last week, which Gaara attributed to Naruto’s ever-growing interest in Hinata. Sasuke couldn’t really judge, not when he himself was constantly running to Suigetsu.

“I have to…go.”

“ _Right, of course! I’ll see you tomorrow._ ”

“ _Hai_.” Gaara hung up and turned to his guitar to practice riffs instead of continuing his stalking. It wasn’t healthy.

 

**[Saturday, 31 December]**

**Album:**  Remembrance

 **Artist:**  Seven Sins

**Tracklisting:**

  1. Waiting for Thunder
  2. Just a Memory
  3. Nostalgia
  4. House of Regret
  5. Remember Me
  6. Forgotten Nightmares feat. Inuzuka Kiba
  7. Belated Apologies
  8. Repentant
  9. Prayer for the Lost
  10. Oneiroi
  11. Omission
  12. Building Monsoon



All songs written and composed by Sabaku no Gaara, Haruno Sakura and Sai. All music by Seven Sins and Hyūga Neji and Hyūga Hinata, unless indicated otherwise.

Vocals: Haruno Sakura, Sabaku no Gaara

Guitar: Uzumaki Naruto, Sabaku no Gaara, Uchiha Sasuke (bass)

Strings: Hyūga Hinata

Keyboard: Sai, Hyūga Neji

Drums: Uchiha Sasuke, Uzumaki Naruto

 

**[Sunday, 25 December: Christmas Day]**

Christmas arrived in a blur of color and festivity, and Naruto hosted a gathering in the band lounge for them all to attend. As a result, five in the evening saw the place crowded not only with Seven Sins, but Gaara’s siblings, and Ino-Shika-Cho as well.

They played corny Christmas carols and Gaara ate too much and drank alcohol _again_ and spent a fair amount of time with his arms around Sakura and Neji.

“I really like your cousin,” he said at one point, and both of them laughed at him.

Later, when he had sobered up a bit and his siblings had left with their respective partners, he pressed his gift into Neji’s hands. “Merry Christmas.”

It was the first time Neji hugged him, and it was even better than Gaara had dreamt of.

**[Saturday, 31 December: New Year’s Eve]**

In the days leading up to the New Year, Gaara spent a fair amount of time with Neji, wrote out a song melody, matched it to one of his poems, titled it, saw his sister, attempted to converse with Shikamaru, slept well, and discovered an affinity for hot chocolate.

Hinata’s birthday was that Tuesday, and they all celebrated it appropriately before getting called in by Kakashi the next day to discuss the possibility of Gaara staying on in the band. Gaara’s lawyer told them his involvement with Seven Sins was only meant to be one album. Naruto argued that Gaara had to stay in Seven Sins. Eventually they came to an agreement: Gaara would accompany them on their _Remembrance_ tour, and then reunite with his siblings.

[#]

The night was loud. The snow was thick outside thanks to the recent snowfall, and the mansion was lit up inside and out like a light bulb. It was Rock Lee’s boss’ place, a giant white cube that Gaara deemed boring and unnecessary.

Inside was more crowded than Gaara was comfortable with. Might Guy apparently had as many contacts as Naruto, because the place contained the members of Seven Sins, Gaara’s siblings, heavy metal band Akatsuki, Five Senses, the members of Sasuke’s old band Taka, the Cynosure siblings, Ino-Shika-Cho, and plenty others that Gaara had no idea of.

Naruto had disappeared with his arms around Rock Lee and Hinata for the majority of the night whilst Sasuke had confined in Suigetsu, and the twins, Sakon and Ukon, had snatched up Sakura.

Having never been one for parties and disliking the person he became when he drank, Gaara had pulled the same stunt that he did on Christmas and found a quiet place in one of the guest bedroom balconies.

“Ever the socialite, Gaara.”

Gaara whipped his head around to see the newcomer: Neji. He relaxed, and the brunet crossed over to him and sat down.

“Naruto was wondering where you were.”

Gaara frowned, “How did you find me?”

“I hazarded a guess.” The brunet shrugs, “It made sense for you to be somewhere quiet.”

Gaara regarded the brunet, and then looked back down at the party. There were two pools and they were filled to the brink with strangers, who laughed loudly and squealed often and sent water everywhere.

“Why aren’t you dragging me back then?”

Neji’s gaze always served to catch Gaara off-guard, but this time was even worse, and then the brunet reached out, thumb touching that spot on Gaara’s cheek as he spoke, “Because it’s almost midnight.” At Gaara’s raised brow, he continued, “I didn’t fancy being caught in an awkward situation.”

“Full of yourself, aren’t you?”

“As are you,” Neji said.

His thumb left Gaara’s face and he looked down at the festivities. He was oblivious to the irresistible urge that overcame Gaara to brush the brunet’s hair back when it fell into his face.

“How many minutes?” Gaara asked, throat clogged up.

“One or two, I think,” Neji said, before the rowdy group below started chanting a countdown. “I stand to be corrected.”

“Well done.”

Neji didn’t say anything. They listened to the crowd below, Gaara wondering if the brunet felt as uncomfortable as he did. Probably not. Gaara was always too sensitive to things. He was overreacting. Fireworks exploded as the countdown erupted in a cacophony of noise, and Gaara raised his brow at the amorous couples below them. People always confused him.

“Stupid, isn’t it?” Neji spoke.

“ _Are?_ ”

“All the fuss for the arrival of another year.”

“I guess.”

The brunet chuckled softly then, crowded in close, and then Gaara did his best not to move as what could only be Neji’s mouth connected with his own.

 _Oh_ , he thought, as Neji stayed there.

He pondered on the possibility of the brunet drinking alcohol tonight, and then found he couldn’t quite care. The proximity was nice.

Kissing was not what Gaara expected. There was a slow intimacy to it, like Neji was picking apart invisible threads in Gaara and unraveling him. There was a sigh, and then Gaara told himself to stop acting like a useless brick and reciprocate, so he answered the brunet’s movements with his own and tried not to think about how inexperienced he was, even though he was right to, because he had never done this before, and—

Eventually Neji’s long kisses turned into short ones, and then stopped altogether. Neither of them spoke for a moment, and then the brunet tilted his head to the side.

“Happy New Year, Gaara.”

“ _H-hai_ ,” Gaara stuttered, quite sure he was blushing.

The brunet leaned back, took up residence in his old spot and said no more. They stayed together in silence until Neji began falling asleep, and then Gaara prodded him inside to the bed. The brunet was gone within minutes. Gaara thought about staying, for the longest while, before slipping out of the room. He hoped the brunet didn’t have a massive hangover.

 

**[Monday, 2 January: Moving Out]**

Gaara emptied his room and shoved all his belongings back into the suitcase he had originally brought them in all those weeks ago. It took some time locating all of his socks, but eventually he found them (mostly under his bed) and shoved them in with the rest of his clothes and books and odd bits and pieces of paraphernalia. That took him to quarter to five, and when he thumped outside with his suitcase and guitar case, Neji was ready too.

Gaara didn’t talk to him, because he didn’t know what to say. His driver was coming at five to take him to the airport, the same time as the others, and when Hinata closed her door with a sigh, they all left for the elevator.

Neji was indifferent, staying on his phone. It was as if they didn’t know how to talk properly anymore, as if they had not just spent six months living in each other’s pockets. Gaara took that as his cue and stuck his headphones in.

His car came first.

Hinata smiled at him and he took her in his arms, wishing he had done it sooner.

Neji smiled tightly at him when Gaara finished with Hinata, and then he stepped forward and wrapped arms around him. Gaara had never been so aware of the height difference before.

“Goodbye, Gaara,” he said.

Gaara bowed, and then disappeared into the car. Temari rang him after ten minutes, checking to see how he was and if he had arrived at the airport yet. She would be at the airport waiting for him.

He was going home.

 

**[Friday, 27 January: Tour]**

**_SEVEN SINS AND K &Y MUSIC PRESENT REMEMBRANCE_ **

_Seven Sins will launch the tour for their latest album this coming April. Having experienced growing success with each album they have released, Seven Sins’ album ‘_ Remembrance’ _is their latest victory yet, with the album acquiring critical acclaim and going platinum in sales twice._

_The dates will take the band around the world for ten shows in fourteen days, and tickets are selling fast. Remembrance Tour will also include supporting act Five Senses at all dates, and kicks off in Sunagakure, followed by venues in Kirigakure, Kumogakure, Iwagakure and finishing up in Konohagakure. All dates on Remembrance are one-off shows, with no extra dates planned for any cities. All dates are expected to sell out._

 

**_Sunagakure_ **

_Friday, 7 April – Suna Convention Centre, U18 (ticket link: http://bit.ly/1hI7IY6)_

_Saturday, 8th April – Suna Convention Centre, 18+ (SOLD OUT)_

 

**_Kirigakure_ **

_Monday, 10 April – Cylinder Hotel, U18 (SOLD OUT)_

_Tuesday, 11 April – Floating Mist, 18+ (ticket link: http://bit.ly/LVFCww)_

 

**_Kumogakure_ **

_Thursday, 13 April – Cloud Nine, U18 (ticket link: http://bit.ly/1kCVNy9)_

_Friday, 14 April – The Hub, 18+  (SOLD OUT)_

 

**_Iwagakure_ **

_Sunday, 16 April – Rock Stadium, U18 (SOLD OUT)_

_Monday, 17 April – HQ, 18+ (SOLD OUT)_

 

**_Konohagakure_ **

_Wednesday, 19 April – Oasis Stadium, U18 (SOLD OUT)_

_Thursday, 20 April – L’Arb Hotel, 18+ (LIMITED TICKETS AVAILABLE)_

_For more information on_ Remembrance _head to: http://www.h &ymusic.com/sevensins/remembrance/_

 

**[Thursday, 16 February: Returning]**

“Gaara.”

“Hm?”

“I’m moving back to Konoha for a bit.”

Gaara paused his music, looking up at Kankurō. “What for?”

“Just makes sense, I guess. Temari’s there with Shika, and Hana’s there too. Let’s be real, I’ve never been good at long distance.”

“This house is too big for me on my own,” Gaara admitted.

It was their family home, passed down to them by Temari, who hadn’t wanted to inherit it in the first place, and Gaara wasn’t keen on only being surrounded by the staff with no one else.

“Can I come with? You know, just for…a bit.”

Kankurō raised a brow, but he shrugged. “Sure.”

**[Tuesday, 28 March: Uncle]**

Gaara was an uncle. The notion was strange, but it was fact, and the living proof lay in Temari’s arms. It was tiny, a result of the baby being a little premature, but Temari couldn’t stop looking at it, and Shikamaru wasn’t wearing his usual expression of boredom.

“Gaara,” Temari said, voice scratchy, and when she looked up at him, her eyes were wet. “Do you want to hold him?”

The baby was barely two hours old. Gaara had been with the members of Seven Sins, celebrating Sakura’s twenty-secound birthday with them, when Kankurō had called him and told him of their nephew’s impending arrival. The others had practically kicked him out of the luncheon party when they found out, and Sakura made him promise to send her photos because it was her birthday and the baby was sharing it with her. Eight hours of labor (and ten cups of ridiculously-priced coffee and two stale hospital sandwiches) later, they had been approached by a nurse, who told them of their sister’s success and led them to her side.

“I…don’t know,” Gaara faltered, but Temari was already beckoning him forward, and then he had an armful of baby.

It really was tiny. Gaara hoped he didn’t drop it. He hoped he didn’t crush it, either.  _Him_ , Gaara corrected. The baby was a human boy, not a fucking robotic doll.

“Kankurō,” Gaara cleared his throat, beckoning at his older brother. “Here, um.”

“Wait, what,  _no_ —” Kankurō spluttered, before quieting when Gaara passed the nephew on. “Shit.” Then he began to panic, “Shit, shit, what do I do, what—”

“Just stay still,” Temari said, eyes closing when Shikamaru leaned over and kissed her nose.

The couple shared a moment that made Gaara beyond uncomfortable, and he looked away, turned to his phone for the time. It was two in the morning.

“He’s pretty small, hey,” Kankurō said gruffly.

“He’s beautiful,” Temari corrected with motherly pride, holding out her arms for him.

Kankurō gave the nephew back, “Decided on a name yet?”

The husband and wife shared a look. “Keiko.”

Gaara nodded, because it was the right thing to do. He had no idea how parents came up with names for their children; some of them were really bad. He wondered how Temari and Shikamaru had decided on Keiko, why it stood out to them.

“Nice,” Kankurō said.

It looked as if the brunet was contemplating finding a girl to settle down and have children with; he couldn’t keep his eyes off their nephew. Gaara was thankful that he didn’t want children. Not yet, anyway. Not whilst he was still self-centered—

But then again, he wasn’t, not really. Six months of Seven Sins and the Hyūga had worn down the majority of his dislike for people, mostly thanks to Naruto’s exuberance, Sakura’s stubborn comfort, and Neji’s quiet musings.

They stayed there for a little while longer, and then Gaara headed home, still trying to wrap his thoughts around the fact that he was an uncle. It was still strange. Kankurō returned a short time later, oblivious to Gaara watching TV as he took a beer from the fridge and left for his room.

His phone was clogged up with texts from Sakura, most demanding why he hadn’t sent a picture of the baby, even though he had seen it. He rolled his eyes and did as the pink haired vocalist requested, messaging her a photo and captioning it with,  _it’s smaller than your patience_.

He would get crucified in the next text he received from Sakura, but it would be worth it.

 

**[Friday, 17 February]**

**_NEWS OF THE DAY: NEW HYŪGA PROJECT ANNOUNCED_ **

_Hyūga Entertainment Label has just released a statement announcing their new project Advent, which will consist of sisters Hyūga Hinata and Hanabi, and their cousin Hyūga Neji. Hinata and Neji both gained widespread attention when they collaborated with Seven Sins on their latest album ‘_ Remembrance’ _, and their youngest counterpart has already made her mark on the music world, with a stunning violin performance at last year’s Junior World Peace Summit. The trio’s formation is seen as a revival of their fathers’ disbanded project ‘Hyūga Harmony’, and Hinata has already voiced their intentions to carry on the Hyūga name._

_Advent debuts March 17! See in leaf for details._

**[Thursday, 13 April: Kumogakure]**

Kumogakure was foggier than Gaara expected, so much so that they didn’t even need smoke machines. The tour had been going for six days, and they had made it to the third city in one piece, tired but still energized somehow. It was going well. Naruto and Sasuke were getting on like a house on fire, and they were sleeping well, even Gaara.

“If I don’t die from your cigarette fumes someday, Gaara,” Sakura coughed. “It’ll be from the clouds up here.”

“I don’t even smoke,” Gaara protested.

He didn’t, not anymore. It was a disgusting habit. Plus he wanted to make it to his twenty-third birthday.

Kumogakure was set high above the rest of the world, tucked away on a mountain and hidden by clouds that clogged in thick and made it hard to breathe. Gaara’s eyes watered. Coming from Suna, he wasn’t used to so much moisture in the air, and the result was sensitive eyes.

“Dramatic,” Sasuke rolled his eyes at Sakura’s sentence.

“Shut your mouth and sign,” Sakura retorted, beaming brightly at the teenaged boy who had given her a photo to scribble her signature onto. “Hi there!”

Gaara would have rolled his eyes, only he had a girl in front of him as well, and she too was fidgeting nervously as he signed her book. They had just completed their first show in Kumo, and the organizers had automatically ushered them off to the signing station, where already a hoard of fans had been lining up.

The girl before his current one had gushed over him in a way that had made Gaara slightly more than worried, since she seemed to know more about him than he knew himself. Then she had asked for a photo, and Gaara had done his best when she whipped out her phone and took one.

He finished signing the current girl’s book and gave her a small, “Thanks,” and she gave a small bow with a flustered smile and hurried away.

Gaara watched her go, reminded of Hinata with her use of honorifics and meek smiles and tendency to blush easily. He missed her. He missed Neji too, but that was a total other subject, which Gaara refused to touch whilst in public. He feared that everyone would know what he was thinking about, because they always knew when Naruto was thinking of Sasuke, and Gaara had a suspicion that he might look the same way.

“Hi!” the boy that Sakura had just signed for appeared in front of him. “Oh my gods, you’re fantastic. I’m your biggest fan.”

Gaara mentally added him to the list, which made it thirty ‘biggest fans’. Poor boy.

When the boy made no move to do anything other than stare at Gaara, he raised a brow, amused, and tilted his head, “Did you want me to sign something, or…?”

The boy brightened up even more so, “Can I have a picture, actually?”

“Sakura,” Gaara pleaded, and the pink haired vocalist jumped in immediately, slinging both arms around Gaara’s neck and giving a smile to the boy’s phone that was all teeth.

“Thank you so much,” the boy cried, literally skipping off.

Sakura laughed at Gaara’s face, saying, “You’re hopeless,” and answering the next in line.

The brunet in front of Gaara made him do a double take. He was tall and pale-skinned with long black hair. Gaara immediately thought of Neji. The boy’s eyes were a bright blue though, like Naruto’s, and he was talking about something that Gaara was having problems deciphering.

Gaara was never going to get used to this side of music.

[#]

Later, much later, when they were all tucked up in bed in preparation for tomorrow’s show, Gaara let his thoughts ramble. He hadn’t seen Neji in a while. Not since the New Year, at least. He had been busy with his family’s new music project, Advent, so the Hyūga had not been able to make Sakura’s birthday or the tour, and Gaara didn’t know what he would tell the brunet if they did contact each other.

There was a large gap between having  _feelings_  for someone and telling them. Yes, Gaara had  _feelings_. Irrevocable ones that were more hopeless than Lee’s feelings towards Sakura, because at least he might have had a chance. Gaara didn’t. He had just kissed Neji and said goodbye to him the next week without so much of a promise of catching up, and he hadn’t talked to him since.

Gaara thought about that kiss a lot.

He thought about what might have happened if he hadn’t let Neji return to the opposite side of the balcony, if he had gotten into bed with the brunet and fallen asleep wrapped around him, instead of choosing the coward’s way out and not mentioning it in the morning. Would Neji and he have progressed to something? Would it have been more awkward? Would Neji have kissed Gaara goodbye and told him they’d catch up in a couple of days, because he was flying to Suna?

Gaara sighed, thumped his head down on his pillow. It was as hard as a brick. There was an empty tub of mint ice cream next to the bed that had helped his throat, and that made Gaara even more unhappy: the fact that he couldn’t even eat his favorite dessert without thinking of Neji.

Irritated, he picked up his phone and scrolled through his contacts, wondering if he had been smart enough to keep the brunet’s number.

He had.

He didn’t think, just pressed ‘Call’ and waited for the robotic speaker to tell him the person he was trying to ring was not available.

Not so. Gaara had never been so unprepared.

On the third ring, the line crackled and a sleepy familiar voice came through, “ _Why are you calling me at three in the morning?_ ”

“It’s ten,” Gaara said automatically, before cringing. “Shit, no it’s not. Not where you are.”

There was a yawn, and then some rustling. A sigh. “ _No, not in Konoha, I’m afraid._ ”

Gaara wanted death. He wanted to hang up and forget that he had even called the brunet.

“ _Well?_ ” Neji spoke. “ _At least tell me how you’ve been all these months. You can’t have called me for nothing._ ”

Gaara blinked, because Neji was right; he actually hadn’t called him for anything apart from the fact that he missed the brunet’s voice.

“I don’t know,” he said eventually, slightly relieved when a low chuckle issued from the speaker.

“ _It’s been a while._ ”

“I know. Sorry.”

Another yawn. “ _That’s okay. Figured you’d be busy with things. Although I can’t imagine why you’re calling me whilst on tour._ ”

“Couldn’t sleep.”

“ _Ah._ ”

“Um. Congrats,” Gaara said, feeling like a child trying to impress their parents, “on Advent, or whatever.”

“ _I don’t want to do it_ ,” Neji said in a quiet voice.

The news struck Gaara as being both weird and believable, “No?”

“ _No. My cousin is a little shit—Hanabi, I mean. Not Hinata._ ”

“I didn’t think so.” Gaara sank back down onto his bed again. “So what else have you been doing?”

“ _Eating. Avoiding Rock Lee’s pleas to become a model._ ” Then he added purposefully, “ _Sleeping._ ”

“You didn’t have to pick up,” Gaara pointed out.

“ _No. I guess not._ ” There was a long moment of silence, and then, “ _What’s kept you from calling before?_ ”

A challenge. Gaara never did like challenges. He studied the blanket underneath him and tugged at a loose thread, stopping when the blanket started to unravel itself. “I didn’t have…anything to say.”

“ _You still don’t._ ”

“No.” Gaara bit his lip, and said, “Should I let you go? So you can sleep or…something.”

“ _No…no. It’s nice, hearing your voice. It’s good._ ”

Gaara felt the stupid smile on his face, but he didn’t wish for death as much. They talked throughout the night, until Neji had to go sometime around six (his time), which meant that Gaara finally went to sleep at one. Neji told him to call him again soon, and Gaara said he would. It was the best sleep he’d had in a while, despite it only being two hours long.

 

**[Friday, 14 April: Excuses]**

“Did you talk to Neji?”

Gaara would have looked at Sakura, only the makeup department was pulling their hair out over his eyes (they kept telling him that he needed to sleep) and he didn’t want to anger them further.

“Well?” Sakura said.

Her makeup was already done, as was her outfit, so she was simply spectating. It was unfortunate for Gaara, because it meant that Sakura already knew what his usual sleep-deprived eyes looked like, and therefore his normal excuses of ‘I slept for twelve hours’ didn’t work because she'd ratted on him instantly.

Gaara had lost track of what she had been saying. “Huh?”

“You talked to Neji, didn’t you?”

 _How does she know?_  Gaara thought, annoyed at how transparent he had become.

“Yes. Why?”

Sakura squealed and jumped up to hug him. Kiko, the makeup artist was dabbing something under his eyes to make them less dark and as a result he couldn’t glare at the pink haired vocalist as hard as he would have liked to.

“About time!” Sakura said. “Hopefully this means you won’t mope about as much.”

“I don’t mope—”

Sakura shut him up, “Yes, you do. Did you talk to him last night?”

She was a lot more insightful than Gaara gave her credit for. He feigned indifference, “Can’t we talk about you and Ino instead?”

Sakura frowned at him. “That’s an off-limit conversation right now.”

“Sakura. What are you doing?”

“ _Gaara,_ ” Sakura whined. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“We need to.”

Sakura took a deep breath, and stared very hard at the mirror. Then Gaara noticed tears in her eyes and felt like the biggest piece of shit in existence.

“Sakura,” he said, ignoring Kiko’s insistent protests and getting up to hug her. “I’m…sorry. For pushing.”

“It’s fine!” Sakura laughed, even though it wasn’t and Gaara didn’t understand how she was finding the situation funny. “Honestly, it’s fine. It was coming for a while. You know that.”

He didn't even know when it had happened and he still felt awful. Who was this stranger, caring about his friend, apologizing? Certainly not the same Gaara from the start of _Remembrance_. “I’m sorry.”

Sakura took the tissue Kiko offered and dabbed at her eyes, looking frustrated. “It just didn’t work out. These things happen.”

“I wouldn’t know,” Gaara confessed, and Sakura laughed again and held him a bit longer.

“You’re an idiot if you don’t ask him out.” She tutted and looked at Kiko. “Kiko, would you be a darling and fix my face? I don’t want to go on stage looking like I just bawled my eyes out.”

“But you did,” Gaara said as Kiko dabbed a makeup sponge against Sakura’s face.

“You’re so helpful,” she said sarcastically. “Ask him out.”

“Why? I don’t want to end up like you and Ino.”

“Okay, first rule? We don’t mention her. Second rule? Don’t use me as an excuse to keep pining.”

“Am I?”

“Yes.”

Kiko moved back, inspected her work, and then straightened, “Right! All done.”

“Thank you,” they both told her, and Sakura dragged him to his feet to find the other three.

Touring with Seven Sins was not what Gaara was used to. They were very group orientated and had chats and group hugs before they performed. Bloody Sands just kind of got ready and made sure they were all on the same page in terms of the show.

They got to Sai first, and then went to find Sasuke and Naruto in their own rooms. Sakon and Ukon passed at one point, lips painted blue and wearing the same creepy smiles as they harmonized together. They weren’t bad in general (hell, they were two of Gaara’s friends), but Gaara still had to get used to them being so tactile.

Sasuke’s room was empty, so they went to Naruto’s instead, and Sakura pushed open the door with, “Naruto, have you seen—oh, hey.”

Naruto looked up, expression guilty. Gaara didn’t see why. Sasuke was sitting down with him on the couch, arms folded and wearing a lot of eyeliner, but there was also a pink tint to his cheeks that Gaara knew wasn’t makeup.

“Hey,” the blond greeted, voice gravelly. “You’re all ready?”

It felt intrusive to Gaara, but Sakura nodded all the same and Naruto gave them a winning smile as he told the three of them to join the pair on the couch. Sakura held Gaara’s hand and he thought that maybe he could be brave enough to ask Neji.

 

**[Mon 17 April: Thing]**

“Thank you so much, Iwa, and good night!”

Gaara sighed gratefully as they made their way off stage. His throat was pounding painfully, and as soon as he stepped down, Naruto was there with a water bottle and ice cream (albeit chocolate).

“Thanks,” he bowed, and the blond ruffled his hair.

“Good work out there, Gaara,” Naruto said.

“Thanks, Dad,” Gaara replied, ducking out the way before Naruto could get him into a headlock.

Sasuke was on his phone, arguing by the looks of it, and he closed his door when they passed. Gaara saw the longing look that Naruto had briefly before he redeemed himself. Foolish friend of his.

Gaara prodded the blond, eating his ice cream. “Why do you bother with him?”

Naruto was quiet for a bit. “I love him.”

“And?”

“I think we’ve finally figured it out.”

Gaara snorted, “I know  _that_ , Naruto.”

“What?” Naruto shrieked, and Gaara winced at the volume.

He rolled his eyes, “You might as well put up signs.”

Naruto was gasping like a fish, and Gaara kicked open the door to the blond’s changing room so that he could collapse on the couch instead of the floor. The blond groaned into one of the pillows.

“But how do you  _know_?” Naruto whined. “It’s not as if we’re like you and Neji were.”

“What about us?”

The blond waved his hands around in motions that Gaara suspected were meant to explain his point, but either Gaara was more socially inept that he thought, or it was another language entirely, “Your whole little dating thing whilst we were all living together.”

“What?”

“Didn’t you two date?”

“No…”

“Oh,” Naruto said, before squinting at him. “You sure? Because you two definitely had a big thing.”

There was that word again: ‘thing’. Why didn’t people call it something else? Like, mutual relationship, or similar? ‘Thing’ just sounded childish, like two girls giggling over the boy who could climb to the top of the playground. ‘Thing’ was not a term that Gaara liked.

“I can guarantee that Neji and I did not date,” Gaara clarified.

“Bull!” Naruto exclaimed. “You two were making eyes at each other from day one. I just figured you two had broken up or something.”

Gaara fidgeted with his spoon. “Not quite. Just…didn’t know how to bridge the gap.”

Naruto peeked out from where he had buried his head in his arms. “Take it from someone who has been after Sasuke for longer than he’d like to remember: ask Neji out and stop wasting time.”

Gaara kept digging around in his ice cream.

 

**[Sunday, 23 April]**

**_SEVEN SINS’ REMEMBRANCE TOUR WRAPS UP IN KONOHA_ **

_After a whirlwind tour of ten shows around Japan in just fourteen days, Seven Sins finally called it quits at home on Thursday and spent Saturday partying well into the night to celebrate their success._

_Check out the photos snapped last night at Seven Sins’ post-tour celebrations here._

 

**[Saturday, 22 April: After-party]**

It was raining. Gaara watched as water trickled down the window panes. He supposed the only thing to be envious of was the silence it held. The after-party was being held at Naruto’s new (much bigger, thankfully) residence, which he’d moved into with Sasuke just before they had embarked on the _Remembrance_ album adventure. His previous place had been absolutely tiny. There weren't as many people Might Guy’s New Year’s Eve party, but the apartment was crowded nonetheless, so Gaara had opted to nurse a couple of drinks on his own before braving the crowds of people. His brother was somewhere; they had come together but Kankurō had been dragged away by Inuzuka Hana and Gaara had not seen him since.

The music travelled everywhere, loud and inescapable. It was one of the reasons Gaara was still in the party instead of somewhere quiet—because there were no, quiet places to disappear to. The other reason he wasn’t seeking out solitude was because he hoped to run into Neji, somehow, because the brunet wasn’t as antisocial as Gaara.

Sakura had been laughing at the bar with Rock Lee, and she dragged the raven over to say hello to Gaara. She was wearing a pink wrap dress and looked the prettiest he had ever seen. He told her as much.

“That was sweet of you,” she laughed, smelling like her namesake and wine. “Have you found your boyfriend yet?”

Gaara shook his head, raised his drink to acknowledge Lee. The raven beamed back enthusiastically and mentioned something about Gaara’s apparent good health.

“Thank you,” he said, not knowing why, and finished his drink.

He was well on his way to drunk, at least.

The DJ switched to an upbeat popular song and Sakura clapped her hands and took the two of them onto the dancefloor. They found Naruto there, and Sasuke. The blond ruffled his hair and Sasuke nodded his head as a greeting, much less icy than the last time Gaara had been dancing with Naruto.

“Dance, Gaara,” Naruto coaxed, and Naruto was his best friend, so Gaara did as the blond asked.

He thought he saw Hinata in the crowd, dancing with a tall stranger, but the midnight blue hair was all he could see, and he didn’t want to make assumptions. It was hard to see anything with the darkness and smoke and florescent lighting.

“Gaara!” a brunette crowed as she swam through the mess of gyrating bodies.

Two arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him in close. Gaara could smell her perfume, a sweet one that reminded him of candy.

“Matsuri,” he commented when she pulled back.

“ _Hai_ ,” she said happily, fist-bumping Naruto. “Gods, I haven’t seen you in ages.”

“Neither.”

“How are you?”

“I’m good,” he said, wondering if the dance floor was the best place to be holding a catch-up conversation.

The brunette was oblivious as she smiled at him, “Sari and I have been wondering where you’ve been. We haven’t seen you in Suna in forever.”

“I’ve been busy.”

Matsuri’s hand on his forearm was almost flirtatious. “Let’s catch up when you’re in Suna again. No excuses.”

“No excuses,” Gaara echoed, curious when she leaned in and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“I have to go,” she apologized, hugging him again. “I’ll see you soon!”

“Alright.”

When she had left, Naruto smirked at him, “Think you’ve got a bit of an admirer there.”

“Yeah,” Gaara said, tangling a hand in his hair briefly. “She’s always had it.”

Naruto laughed then, loud and clear and cutting, and shook his head. Sakura was far too preoccupied with Rock Lee, and Gaara sensed that Sasuke wanted to copy them and dance like that with Naruto, so he left the two couples and went hunting for a space to breathe.

He found Hinata instead of space, and her hug was just like he remembered, soft and small. She didn’t know where her cousin was, but he was most definitely at the party because they had apparently arrived together, and she gave him a knowing look at his question. Gaara acted ignorant, and they stayed together for a good portion of the night, talking about how terrible alcohol tasted and Advent.

“Well done on the concert,” she added, and her head was light where she had it rested upon his arm.

“Thanks.”

She fell asleep a little while later, and Gaara felt a large protective urge overcome him, so he scooped her up and put her in Naruto’s bedroom, and then he stayed with her because it was lockable and he didn’t trust any of the partygoers not to barge in on her if she was left alone. He'd probably kill anyone who would try to do anything to her, if Neji didn't beat him.

It was midnight, he realized, stepping out onto Naruto’s balcony to get some fresh air into his lungs. There was a residual urge to smoke, but he quieted it. It wasn’t like he had cigarettes on his person anyway.

He sighed, and a voice said, “Stop thinking so loudly.”

It was quiet, but it demanded attention, and Gaara knew it all too well. He turned to the other end of the balcony, where a tall silhouette was leaning against the railing, arms crossed before him. He hadn’t noticed that the balcony was occupied.

 _Sumimasen_ , he thought to say, but he didn’t, saying instead, “Where have you been all night?”

“Looking for a quiet place. Thought I might run into you. Or something.”

Gaara took the brunet’s face in his hands and kissed him.

[#]

It was quicker than Gaara remembered. Either his imagination had slowed down the memory, or Neji was actually kissing him at a less languid pace this time.

Regardless, there were familiar parts, like the way Neji’s mouth felt like it was prying his apart, and the brunet hair falling into his face, and the soft sigh filling the space between them. Gaara was tempted to gather the brunet’s hair up in his hands and let his fingers get tangled, but it was hard to focus on two things at once.

Kissing, Gaara decided, required a fair amount of concentration.

He was unaware of how long they remained like that. Neji’s hands moved continually from Gaara’s waist to his jaw and back again, as if he couldn’t make his mind up. Gaara kept his eyes closed, wondering how soon he could stop to take a breath, but it was difficult trying to detach oneself from an eager partner. He found it out when he stopped to gulp in some air, certain he looked like Naruto, only to have Neji’s mouth on his a moment after.

All things had a period of regression, though, and kissing was no exception. Neji finally became less demanding and Gaara opened his eyes again as the brunet stopped. They caught their breaths, and Gaara refrained from saying something, because it would most likely be a stupid exclamation of how good kissing was.

Neji brushed the areas under Gaara’s eyes. “Hi.”

Gaara snorted, reached up and pressed their mouths together again.

[#]

A long time later, they stopped. Somewhere between the making out and the periods of breathing, they reached an agreement to leave Naruto’s room and call a taxi. It was no longer raining, but there were massive puddles along the driveway and Gaara took care to avoid them. He hated water. Neji wasn’t as careful; he stepped in them, ignorant of the splashes to his jeans, and he rolled his shoulders at Gaara’s incredulous look.

The brunet pushed him against the gate and kissed him there, playful, before migrating to his neck and staying for a while. Then it began to rain again and the taxi arrived, so they got in before it drenched them both and drove to Gaara’s apartment.

It poured down when they arrived, and Gaara had forgotten his stupid card for the entrance, so the only way inside was running through fifty meters of torrential rain. He was contemplating just forgoing the apartment, but he was cold from the previous rainfall, and he was already beginning to envisage the warmth of his living room, so they got out and sprinted. Neji was laughing when they arrived. Gaara had to look away, feeling perverted.

He also felt like a drowned rat, so they went up to his level and stood awkwardly in the doorway.

“I’ll get towels,” Gaara said eventually, skipping off to his bathroom and leaving Neji to drip over the doormat.

He got three, one for himself and two for Neji, and then hid behind his own as Neji’s hair used one and his clothes used another. The rain was hitting the windows of the apartment at a speed Gaara deemed dangerous. He was glad he wasn’t standing in it. The drops were brutal.

“This is okay, isn’t it?” Neji said, “Me being here, I mean.”

It was as if they hadn’t talked on the phone beforehand. Gaara nodded quickly, hiding his face behind his towel when he wanted the world to ingest him whole. Neji didn’t speak further, which was a good thing, because Gaara had no clue what to say (as usual). They had already pushed past the awkward ‘why didn’t you call me before’ earlier, and then they had kissed a lot, and now Gaara was speechless.

When they were dry—or actually, less likely to create an ocean in the living room—Neji surveyed the apartment, pale eyes stopping on the piano in the far corner. Gaara had gotten it on a whim, not because he had hoped that one day he would reach a more standard level of social skills and maybe throw a party like Naruto and run into Neji along the way. Kankurō had given it a once over and ignored it, and Gaara had played on it once before giving it no more attention or thought.

“Can I?” Neji asked, but he was already there, lifting up the cover, slipping his fingers over the keys.

Gaara would have been cruel to say no. Regardless, he gave an affirmative gesture and felt even more like a drowned rat as the brunet began to play an unknown melody. Then it shifted into something that Gaara knew, tinged in his memory somewhere.

“Remember this?” Neji said softly, and Gaara felt like slapping his forehead.

Of course he did, he never forgot. Somehow, he thought the brunet knew this.

Gaara remembered everything, though. He remembered his childhood, his mental breakdown when they started Bloody Sands, meeting Naruto for the first time, and hating Sasuke for being so similar to his own self. He remembered Ino-Shika-Cho, and he remembered Neji, too, like how warm the inside of his mouth was on New Year’s, why he preferred barley tea, and how he liked hot chocolate and mint ice cream.

The clock on the wall ticked loudly as Neji played the tune in a noncommittal fashion, towel hanging around his neck. Gaara went over to stand by him, bit his lip, contemplated for a moment, and then decided he had every right to and pushed their mouths together.

The response was immediate. Neji’s hand found its way into Gaara’s hair again and their feet got tangled and their noses bumped, but it was still the best feeling and Gaara didn’t care when their teeth clacked, until Neji stopped with a huff and restarted with a lot more finesse.

This one was even longer than the previous instances, but Neji was gentler, less rushed, and Gaara took his time exploring, learning how to move his mouth properly against the brunet’s and how to lick the brunet’s tongue. The latter movement made Neji falter in his own reciprocation, so Gaara did it again, feeling ridiculously pleased when the brunet made a strangled noise.

Then he pushed forward hard enough for Gaara to lose his footing, and they both stumbled backwards, the piano keys groaning out a jarring tune.

Neji burst out laughing and Gaara gave a hesitant smile, hiding his face in the brunet’s damp shirt.

“Come on,” the brunet said eventually.

“Where?”

“Your room.” Neji said simply, one hand running through his drying hair.

Gaara’s heart was stuck in his throat. “Why?”

“Because we’re not having sex against your piano.” Neji must have seen the bewildered look on Gaara’s face, because he pressed his lips to Gaara’s cheekbone, “Unless you want to.”

“No,” Gaara said, brain trying to catch up with Neji’s words. “The noise. It would be…” He grimaced at the visual assault, mumbled, “Loud,” and then regretted his entire existence at the horrible choice of words.

“Thunderous,” Neji agreed.

Gaara led him there without a word.

He wished he’d had the foresight to clean his room. The bed was unmade, and he had records all over the floor amongst his guitar and notebooks and odd jumpers. Neji stayed in the doorway, pale eyes taking it all in whilst Gaara stayed by his bed and attempted not to look nervous, even though his heart was a hummingbird where it was embedded in his esophagus.

“Right,” Neji said after a brief moment, and he stepped forward, fingers peeling away Gaara’s shirt.

Then he began on the buckle of Gaara’s trousers and Gaara went bright red, hands sinking into the loops of Neji’s jeans to ground himself. He probably matched his hair color.

“You can take them off, y’know,” Neji said, teasing, and Gaara almost died.

He wished he had done this before. Then he would know what to do. Neji was hard though, had been so since they had started out in the living room against the piano, so he took that as a good sign and tried removing the brunet’s pants. Gaara’s fingers weren’t cooperating, but he got them undone, at least, and then couldn’t bring himself to be brave enough to push them down. Neji pulled off his pullover and the shirt underneath, and they fell to the floor with a wet  _slop_ before he brushed his hair out of the way and leaned in to kiss Gaara again.

It was easier this way, doing something he knew about. He wondered if Neji knew he had never done this before.

They fell to the bed in a rather undignified manner, causing Neji to laugh again and Gaara to turn even redder (he most definitely matched his hair color now) and then they were kissing again, Neji’s hand pushing on Gaara’s knee until he could slot his thigh between Gaara’s, and shit, Gaara was completely unprepared for this.

“Neji?” he said quietly, far too aware of the brunet’s rolling hips.

Why did people do this? It was so vulgar sometimes.

“Hm?” the brunet hummed, kissing him quickly, and then his hips moved just so and Gaara forgot all his skepticism about the entire act.

It was very hard not to just jerk his hips up into Neji’s until he forgot himself, but Gaara was both too proud to sink down to that basal level, and too embarrassed to even think of initiating the movement.

“Stop blushing,” Neji murmured, forearms bracketing Gaara’s head. “It’s distracting.” Then, when Gaara just felt his face get even hotter, Neji jerked his hips and nuzzled Gaara’s nose, “Gods. We’re never going to get all the way at this rate. Have you got anything?”

Gaara really really hoped Neji knew he was the first one doing this. He was also clueless to what Neji had asked for.

He gave an ambiguous answer, “I don’t know.”

Neji pressed a kiss to Gaara’s nose, “Has your brother got any then? I bet he does.” And then he was up and off Gaara, leaving the room with a quick, “I’ll be back.”

Without Neji in it, the bed felt enormous, and the room looked like an ocean. Gaara was trapped in a bubble of thoughts, some eager, some apprehensive, and he was  _still_  hard. His heartbeat was roaring in his ears. He stared up at the ceiling and pressed a hand to his throat.

“Bingo,” Neji said, reentering, and he climbed over Gaara, kissing him instantly.

Something landed on the bed next to Gaara, and he realized what it was as soon as Neji got to his jugular. It was for lubrication. Of course. Kankurō bought it in bulk. He wouldn’t miss it.

Gaara swallowed hard and watched as Neji sat back on his haunches, hands reaching out to grip Gaara’s knees and hook them over his thighs.

“You know this is new,” Gaara blurted out. “For me, I mean. As in, never done this before kind of new.”

Neji paused to look at him, pale eyes calm and calculating. Then he leaned forward and kissed Gaara intently, like he was trying to say something. He pulled back too, as if he wanted to vocalize it, but Gaara was too shy to hear what the brunet had to say just yet, so he wrapped arms tight around the brunet’s neck and distracted him for a while with his tongue.

It was inevitable that they stopped sometime, though, and Neji’s hands finally stopped playing around  _that_ area. Gaara’s heart had calmed down, but when Neji rocked back on his heels again to reach for the lubrication, it began stuttering rapidly again. He wanted another kiss.

“Is this okay?” Neji checked.

Gaara swallowed nervously and dipped his head in acknowledgement. Of course it was okay, it was more than okay. He had never been so aroused in his life. That, and the fact that he really really wanted to do it. Neji ran another hand through his hair, smiled briefly, and then wrapped a hand around Gaara’s erection and followed with his mouth.

“What the fuck.” Gaara said, and then, “Neji,” and then, “ _Fuck_.”

A low chuckle reverberated deep in Neji’s throat and Gaara’s erection caught every vibration, and he couldn’t fucking  _think_. Neji was careful, and lazy, head moving languidly over the length of Gaara as his hands held Gaara’s hipbones. Gaara whimpered, contemplated crying, and screwed his fingers into the bed sheets beneath him. He couldn’t thrust, because of Neji’s strong hands, but the urge was so tempting.

Then the brunet pulled off with, “This’ll be cold,” and took him in his mouth again, and ‘cold’ was an understatement, because Gaara was going to freeze to death at this rate.

Death by cold gel. Ice cubes, even. Gaara hated water.

Neji’s finger felt both invasive and far too good than it had any right to, and Gaara needed to stop squirming. Neji gave him a breathless smile and used his free hand to find the same spot on Gaara’s ribs from that time in the snow, chuckling softly. Gaara hadn’t known it was okay to laugh during sex.

“Neji,” he complained, jolting when the brunet pushed up against something.

The brunet hummed and continued, lingering around the…area. Or thing; Gaara’s wasn’t sure what to call it, only now he was flushed from arousal rather than embarrassment. Neji ran his hand through his hair again habitually (and also maybe to clear it from his face) and lurched forward to kiss Gaara again, continuing to hum in his mouth, and it was that tune again.

“What’re you going to call it?” Gaara said, gasping when Neji’s fingers multiplied.

Neji let their mouths brush together a little more, hovering when he gave a purposeful nudge, “Don’t know. Maybe ‘Sandcastles’.”

Gaara nodded, teeth chattering, “Apt.”

“Yeah,” Neji agreed, taking his bottom lip between his teeth.

Gaara stared at him in longing, and then replaced Neji’s teeth with his own, groaning when the brunet’s fingers picked up a rhythm. He should have done this sooner. He place cautious hands on Neji’s shoulders and kissed the brunet’s nose, mouth curving up when Neji grinned.

“Are we there yet?” he questioned, feeling inept.

Neji bumped that spot in answer, “Are you?”

Gaara blinked, uncertain of how to answer. Then he kissed the brunet again. He had no idea. Maybe. Probably. Wasn’t this just the part when Neji did the…thing…and then great rewards afterwards? Kami in heaven, now was definitely not the time to be thinking of Rock Lee.

Initiative, Gaara decided, was the best course to take, so he wrapped his arms and legs around Neji and kissed him hard enough to hurt, trying to tell the brunet it was okay to just do…whatever. He was pitiful at communication.

“Right,” Neji said in a wavering voice, and then he was breaching Gaara and Gaara was about to die.

He couldn’t breathe. He was getting split in two. His head hurt, and there was a roaring in his ears, followed by an unnerving silence, the type one got when their ears were blocked. Vaguely, he was aware of the brunet pushing in and then stopping, and then there was nothing but chests against each other, breathing in sync.

It felt…new.

“Yep,” Neji said in a strangled voice, pulling out marginally and rejoining, making an unholy noise. “This is going to be…yep, no.”

Gaara’s brows scrunched together, taking in the look of utter craving on Neji’s face.

“Kami, Gaara,” he muttered, and then his hips were moving like before.

People never mentioned how much the bed moved when people had sex, but Gaara noticed it, even though it was minimal. The brunet had his face against Gaara’s jaw and Gaara was staring up at the ceiling, wanting to know how he was meant to feel about the entire situation, because currently, it was both breathtaking and perplexing. Then Neji managed to find that place again and Gaara had about two seconds to choose the former opinion before he lost himself.

[#]

Much, much (much) later, Gaara was curled up on the couch with Neji, watching the rain sluice down the panes of the apartment. It had gotten light somewhere between Gaara losing focus on reality and the two of them finishing together, and the grey morning had settled in like a disease.

They were listening to Gaara’s record player and Neji hummed occasionally. After the sex, Gaara had gone for a shower on his own, because he had been filthy and shy, and then Neji had taken his own whilst Gaara stormed around his room cleaning.

The rain upped its assault as the track changed, and Neji sighed into Gaara’s neck. They were both drowsing, tired from staying up all night, although Neji was holding out much better than Gaara thought he would. Gaara was an insomniac; he would survive.

“When did you start?” Neji asked eventually, thoughtful.

Gaara looked blankly at his tea, “Start what?”

“This,” Neji said unclearly, hand brushing up Gaara’s side beneath his shirt and grinning when Gaara wriggled uncomfortably.

“I don’t know.”

“Remember that night,” Neji began, and Gaara needed to tell him that he remembered everything, “when I woke you up and we made castles in the snow? And I tickled you…” At Gaara’s nod, he continued, “I was going to kiss you, y’know.”

“Should have,” Gaara said in a hushed voice, before Neji took it from him.

The brunet was beautiful like this, long hair draped around his shoulders and arms encircling Gaara. They stopped with the rain, and then had to heat their stone-cold teas. Neji skipped over to the kitchen in bare feet, and when he returned with the hot cups, Gaara wondered if he should be worried about frostbite when they collided with his own socked toes. Neji had hushed his bitter complaints and called him weak, which naturally, progressed into sarcastic banter and more activities that Gaara liked to keep in his memory.

“Advent,” Gaara said carefully, remembering his conversation with Neji the other night about the project, and how much the brunet didn’t want to do it, and how often he had thought about the possibility of his plan. “Pull out.”

Neji looked at him, “I can’t just do that—”

“Stall, then,” Gaara offered.

“How?”

“Do an album with me,” Gaara said, trying not to sound too keen, but not too uninterested either. “Temari and Kankurō are back, and we’re always needing a keyboardist.”

Neji rubbed his nose, “This is another Seven Sins adventure, isn’t it?”

“Maybe,” Gaara said, knowing he had won.

Gaara wasn’t sure when he fell asleep, only one minute he was trying to get Neji to stop singing along to one of Bloody Sands tracks (that Gaara had no idea he had) and the next he was unconscious.

 

**[Sunday, 20 August]**

**Album** : Till Death Do Us Part EP

 **Artist** : Bloody Sands

**Tracklisting:**

  1. Diving for Cadavers
  2. Wedding Vows
  3. Asylum for the Dead
  4. Hurt
  5. The Killing



All songs written and composed by Sabaku no Gaara and Hyūga Neji. All music by Bloody Sands and Hyūga Neji, unless indicated otherwise.

Vocals: Sabaku no Gaara

Guitar: Sabaku no Temari

Drums: Sabaku no Kankuro

Keys: Hyūga Neji

 

**[end]**


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